


Where You Belong

by AuraSweet13



Category: The Blacklist (TV)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Gen, Rape is alluded to in Chapter 15 and mentioned in chapter 16
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-16
Updated: 2015-10-15
Packaged: 2018-04-09 17:07:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 17
Words: 31,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4357403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AuraSweet13/pseuds/AuraSweet13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set a couple weeks after The Kenyon Family. Samar can’t stop thinking about the young boy she helped out. And from there, she makes a decision.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to thebeautifulbadass for all her ideas and input.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning

Nowadays, it was seldom that they ever had a break from the Blacklist cases that Reddington brought them. But for once, they did, and Samar Navabi was utilizing every second to her advantage. Though that really didn't mean anything extravagant. Just sitting down with a bowl of pasta, the news on as white noise in the background. She had just swallowed a spoonful of food when she heard on the news that a child was missing. But it wasn't just any kid.

"Finn Westin was reported missing by his mother Dawn only a few hours ago. She said she got back from grocery shopping and the boy was gone." She looked up, and sure enough, the little boy she had developed a surprising attachment to in the short time she had been able to help him out was on the screen. He was cleaner than he had been when she met him, but it had been at least two weeks. Her dinner forgotten, she all but jumped up from her chair and hurried to the phone to call the local police department. She knew this wasn't her problem, knew she should leave well enough alone.

But she just couldn't.

She couldn't forget the little boy she'd talked out of blowing up a van, thus killing both of them in the process, couldn't forget how he clung to her like she was his lifeline, like he felt safe with her. The only other person who'd ever done that had been her brother, years ago. When they'd both been young and innocent, before she'd abandoned him without a second thought.

That was why she was getting all the information she could. Because if she didn't help this little boy, who would? His own mother had said as much, that she'd thought he was dead. How many others had that same belief? Hopefully the news broadcast would help, but she wouldn't hold her breath on that. She knew signs of negligent behaviour when she saw them, and his mother had all of them. The casual way she'd brought up the walkabout and what happened to her son had made Samar vastly uncomfortable. She knew it was likely a result of the indoctrination of Justin Kenyon, but still. When she got away, why hadn't she even attempted to look for her son? That was what Samar would've done.

_If I find him, I'm going to make sure he never has to go back to her again._ She thought as she hung up with the police department. Then she grabbed her coat and her keys and headed out the door. She had a child to find.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Samar goes looking for Finn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, special thanks to thebeautifulbadass for all her input and ideas.

It occurred to Samar that she had absolutely no idea where to look for a ten year old kid who had gone missing from his home. She'd been driving around for an hour now, maybe two, with absolutely no results. In truth, she was getting discouraged. But she wouldn't give up. As she drove, she racked her brain, trying to think of places a ten year old boy would go. Because she didn't get the feeling he had been abducted. But she was drawing a blank.

And then, as she thought, she remembered something important. She remembered driving back to the Post Office, the boy, whom she now knew to be called Finnian, clutching her sleeve, curled into her side. The fact that he wanted to be this close to her had scared her, but she'd also felt a wave of protection and nurturing like she hadn't in a very long time, and in the next moment she was insisting that they get him something to eat. Who knew when had he last eaten? He was pretty thin for a child his age. Unfortunately, the only place to eat on the middle of nowhere road was a McDonald's. She remembered Finn gobbling down his cheeseburger and fries, as if he hadn't eaten in weeks-maybe he hadn't. The whole time, he'd sat beside her, wanting to be close, his leg against her own. The silence between them had been comfortable.

She had no way of knowing for sure, but she had to at least try. So she continued on her path, tracing back from where the van had been. It wasn't there now, but she remembered where it had been.

 

When she arrived at the McDonald's, she felt a wave of relief crash over her. There he was, sitting on the curb, hands folded in his lap. She parked her car and then got out. As soon as he saw her, he stood up and launched himself at her, throwing his arms around her. She was shocked, but it only took her a couple of seconds to hug him back. "We really have to stop meeting like this." She tried to make a joke.

He muttered something into her stomach that she barely heard. But she did hear it. "I knew you'd find me."

She pulled back just enough to look at him. In truth, Samar hated to mention the woman who had given her such a bad feeling. But she was Finn's mother, not Samar. She closed her eyes, inhaled slowly, and then exhaled just as slowly, opening her eyes to look at him. "Your mother's looking for you." She told him, hand absently stroking his hair.

Finn shook his head. "No, no, I wanted to find _you_."

Her eyes widened. "What?"

"Samar, she doesn't care about me." Finn told her. She hadn't expected him to address her by name. Yes, she had given it, but she never expected him to use it. Then again, she never expected to see him again after his mother took him from the Post Office, either. And yet here they were. "I ran away because I don't want to live with her. I want to live with you."

Samar's eyes widened even further. She'd never entertained the thought of having children, not only because there wasn't anyone in her life she wanted to have a kid with, but because she didn't think she'd be a good parent. She hadn't thought she was very good with kids, truthfully. But she cared about Finn and wanted him to be able to grow up safe and happy, and he couldn't do that under the roof of a woman who still believed in the teachings of Justin Kenyon. But, could he do that under the care of an extremely busy FBI agent with blood on her hands?  She didn't know, and she was scared to find out. "Come on, let's go for a drive, and you can tell me all about it."

 

Samar's hands gripped tightly to the steering wheel. She was outraged and disgusted, and both of those feelings were putting how she felt mildly.  She wasn't upset with him, God no, but she was upset at the treatment he went through. Not just with the walkabout, but even before that, and especially at home as of late. How could his mother neglect such a sweet little boy? It reminded her so much of the way her own parents had treated her, and maybe that was part of the reason she was so angry about it. How her parents cast her aside like she was nothing once her brother came along. Her younger brother, no less. Treated like the golden child just because he was a boy and she was a girl.

"...She keeps leaving me alone in the house for hours..."

Samar knew how that felt. she wouldn't say it, but that didn't mean it was any less true. Even before her brother was old enough to talk and walk, she knew how to cook for herself and the rest of her family. She hated people who thought they could treat children like that simply because they were children.

"Samar, where are we going?" She was jolted out of her thoughts by Finn's innocent voice. And in that moment, she realized that she couldn't take him back to his mother. Yes, it would be the right thing to do because she was his mother. But doing so would be handing him back over to a woman who he had told her himself had neglected him, leaving him alone for hours at a time.

"The police office, kiddo. We're going to fix this."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me what you think.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Samar tries to get Finn out of the grip of his neglectful mother.

"I'm scared." Finn spoke up, his little voice cutting through the silence like a knife. The car was parked outside the police station, and the pair was sitting in it, as if both were working up the courage to go inside. As soon as the car came to a halt, Finn had unstrapped and clambered into the passenger seat to be closer to her. Samar had nothing but understanding as she looked over at him. If he didn't want to say anything more than that, it was okay by her. She wanted him to be comfortable, and besides, he didn't need a reason to be scared. He was a ten year old kid, for crying out loud. "The police will take me back to my mom."

Samar reached for his hand and delicately took it in her bigger one. "Not if I can help it." She told him seriously, not looking away. "Finn, I'm not going to let anything happen to you. You'll always be safe with me."

Finn held up his little pinkie. "Pinkie promise?"

Samar didn't hesitate. She locked her pinkie around his. "Pinkie promise." Though she would never dare say it in general, but especially not around him, she was scared, too. She'd never done anything like this, she didn't know the first thing about fighting for a child whose only guardian was a neglectful mother, whose only upbringing was in a cult. But she was going to try her damn hardest. If someone was going to fight for him, why couldn't it be her? "Are you ready?"

He nodded. "Ready." Samar got out of the car and walked around to the passenger side door to grab him. She opened the door and helped him out of the car.

"Do you want me to carry you in, or do you want to walk?" Samar asked, trying to ignore the fact of her fear continuing to build the closer they got to being in the building.

"I can walk." Finn said, and this time it was him who reached for her hand. "It's okay that you're scared," His words made her feel like the wind had been knocked out of her, but in a good way. No one had ever picked up on something she didn't want them to before, but he was clearly more perceptive than most. Truthfully, it just made her want to protect him even more. "but I won't let my mom hurt you, don't worry."

So they were going to protect each other. His words made her smile as she leaned down to kiss the top of his head. "Thank you, I appreciate that." Then she stood upright and together, they started into the station.

It took everything Samar had in her not to flinch as the doors shut behind them. Samar hadn't thought this far through, not even close. "Come on." She murmured to Finn, and the two of them moved over to the desk, where a man was sitting at a computer, and another was nearby. Finn wasn't tall enough to reach the top of the desk, so when the receptionist looked up, he only saw Samar.

"Yes?" He asked.

"I found the missing boy." Samar felt his grip on her hand tighten as she said this, and she knew why. Because as soon as her words were processed, the man before her-his nametag read Evan-would likely call Finn's mother.

Evan peered around the desk and nodded at Finn, who nodded back politely, nestling closer to Samar. "I'll notify his mother."

Samar met the eye of the officer who had been standing nearby. "I need to speak with you privately before she gets here. It's urgent."

The man nodded. "Of course." Again, Finn's grip got even tighter on her hand. For a child, he had a strong grip when he wanted to.

Samar turned back to him, trying not to lose her resolve. "Finn, just stay right here with Evan. I'll be right back." He nodded and let her hand go, and she gave him what she hoped was a reassuring smile before ruffling his hair gently. Then she walked over to the officer, whose name she would have to find out, and then the pair of them stepped away. "The reason he ran away from home is because his mother is neglectful." Samar told him softly, watching his eyebrow raise. "He told me she'll leave him home alone for hours at a time. Not only that, but as I'm certain you're aware, she is a former follower of Justin Kenyon, and her son grew up in that environment." She was careful in her word usage, fearing 'cult' might not sound professional. Though there was a note of disgust in her tone that she didn't bother trying to conceal. "I’m with the FBI and I rescued him from the Kenyon property two weeks ago where he was horribly mistreated." She knew mentioning the walkabout would be her best bet to getting the law enforcement on her side about this whole matter. "According to her, Kenyon became paranoid when he realized there were too many children that were boys. So he organized something called the walkabout, which was a sort of false celebration. Boys were chosen at random and treated like royalty, and after the fact, the chosen boys were taken into the woods and abandoned, left to die. He was one of them. His mother didn't even know he was alive until two weeks ago."

The man nodded in understanding. "I have a daughter, she's eight. She's my whole world. In my opinion, if a parent isn't willing to do whatever it takes to keep their kid safe, they're not fit to be a parent. I'm Cam, by the way. Well, Officer Jackson."

"Samar." She wanted to do this with as little trouble as possible. She started to say something else, but all thoughts flew from her hearing Finn cry out. 

She whirled to see his mother there, tightly gripping his arm and looking angry.  
"What were you thinking, running away like that?" Samar watched her grip tighten on his arm, causing him to wince in pain.

Rage filled her and she stalked over, placing her hand on his shoulder protectively. "Don't touch him." She spat.

"You again? Why can't you just stay out of our lives?" Dawn asked, not relinquishing her grip on Finn. Samar didn't relinquish her grip either, however hers was much less bruising.

"He came looking for me." Samar argued back, wanting nothing more than to arrest her. But Finn needed her more, and it was her attachment to him that won out instead.

"Who do you think you are? He's my son." Dawn clearly wasn't backing down. Well, neither was she.

"You certainly don't treat him like your son, he left you for a reason." Samar was having a hard time keeping her temper in check. "Mothers are supposed to love their children more than life itself, and you don't, I can tell you don't, I knew as soon as I met you. Finn came looking for me because he didn't want to be with you. He wants to be loved like a child should be."

**SLAP.**

If Samar had been expecting it, she would've been able to block it. But she wasn't, and as a result the force of it sent her head to the side, pain stinging through her cheek. She turned her gaze back to Dawn, speechless for the first time in years. Not only that, she was livid. She watched Officer Jackson come over to restrain her, feeling smug but not letting it show. As Finn started to cry, however, she turned her attention away from that and knelt to his level. "Hey, hey, we're going to figure this out. Everything's going to be fine." She spoke softly.

"I'm sorry, I said I wouldn't let her hurt you." Finn said through his sobs.   
He was crying for her? Heart breaking, she gently pulled him into her arms and held him, letting him cry and reassuring him that she was all right. She could hear his mother, furious and screaming in the background, but it was easy for her to ignore, because she was so focused on consoling Finn. She looked up, however, as Officer Jackson came back out. "We have to get all this sorted out, but she’ll be here for a while. Does he have anywhere to stay in the meantime?”

"He can stay with me. I don't think he has any other family, at least none that are around." Samar looked down to Finn for confirmation as the pair of them got up. He shook his head.

"Okay." Officer Jackson nodded. "But, I'll need you to fill out some paperwork, show identification. Protocol."

Samar nodded. "Of course." and then she walked over to the desk with Finn at her side, taking the pen that was offered to her. As they ran a background check, she filled out the paperwork diligently. Her other hand remained in Finn's. She signed the forms and handed them back, along with her card. "Call me with any updates."

He nodded graciously. "Of course. Have a good night."

"You too." Samar said, and then her and Finn left the police station hand in hand.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first night at home.

As soon as Samar parked in front of her apartment building, she was exhausted. She hadn’t been able to finish eating in her haste to find Finn, not to mention it was close to two o clock in the morning now. But she could worry about all of that later. She turned off her car and then shifted to look at Finn. He was asleep in the back seat. Smiling just a little, she got out and moved silently around to the back to bring him into the apartment. She unstrapped him and scooped him into her arms. Samar was careful and silent in shutting the door, and with some struggle she managed to lock the car. When she got to the door, fumbling with her keys, Finn stirred in her arms, causing her to cease all movement as she looked down at him. His eyes were closed, and she assumed he was still asleep.  
Until he spoke. “Where are we?” He mumbled, looking up at the building with barely open eyes.

“This is where I live.” Samar kept her tone soft. “You’re safe here, okay?”

His arms slid around her neck, and instinctively her grip on him tightened just a little. “Okay. Safe… You’re safe too.” Finn nestled his face against her neck as he said this. Samar finally managed to get her keys in the door after this happened, and she carried him inside. She chose not to take the stairs to her third floor apartment, though she usually did. If she didn’t have a half-asleep, ten year old child in her arms, she probably would’ve. But the fact of the matter was, she was just too tired. So, she stepped into the elevator and pressed the button for her floor. She barely moved until the doors opened, in which she stepped out into the hallway and headed to her apartment. She had to be conscious of how loud she was being, because of how early it was. The last thing she wanted to deal with right now was irate neighbours. She reached her apartment and stuck the key in the lock, twisting it as best she could while still holding on to Finn. As soon as she entered her home, he nestled closer to her. “I wanna stay with you.” He mumbled.

She kissed the top of his head. “Okay, but we have to get ready for bed.” He nodded. She turned on a couple lights so they could see where they were going, and as she did so, she realized how bare (dare she say boring?) her apartment was. True, she was used to being the only one living here, but still. If he was going to be with her permanently, which he would if he wanted to and if she had anything to say about it, she needed to change that. “I’m going to put you down for a little bit. Do you want the first turn in the bathroom?”

“Please.” Finn murmured, and she smiled at his polite tone as she set him gently on his feet and walked into the bathroom, making sure it was in order. She hurried to the bedroom and grabbed a shirt of hers that she hadn’t worn in a while. It would be big on him, but it would have to do until she figured something out.

She moved out of the bathroom to make room for him. “Just let me know when you’ve finished.” She smiled as he walked past her, and then headed out to the kitchen, where the untouched bowl of pasta sat. Samar debated putting it in the fridge for tomorrow, but shortly after she decided against it. There was no point, considering she’d probably be too busy to eat it tomorrow too. So, with a tired sigh, she walked over and picked up the bowl, bringing it over to the trash can. She scooped the pasta into the bin, ignoring the way her stomach rumbled slightly as she did so. When it was empty, she moved over to the sink and grabbed the dishcloth, washing it so the pasta sauce didn’t stain the bowl, or stick to it. She dried the bowl and put it away, as Finn came out of the bathroom wearing the shirt. She smiled when she saw him. “Hey. Do you want something to eat before bed?” She didn’t have much food, another problem she would have to fix, but if he was hungry she’d figure something out. He nodded. Samar had a thought, then. “Are you allergic to peanut butter?”

Finn shook his head, grinning so brightly Samar had to grin as well. “I love peanut butter!”

“Great!” Samar moved over to the pantry to grab the peanut butter, and the fridge to grab the jam. “Toasted?” She asked, laughing softly when he made a face of disgust and shook his head. “Okay, so not toasted. Noted.” She placed the bread out. “One last thing, what do you prefer first? Peanut butter or jam?” She had to ask, just in case. She wanted him to be comfortable with her.

Finn looked surprised by her question. “I like peanut butter first.”

Samar nodded. “I can do that.” Turning back to the task at hand, she started to methodically make the sandwich, taking in to account how he liked it. “Crust or no crust?”

“No crust.” He told her, and when she had made the sandwich she cut the crusts off.

“Any specific shape?”

“Triangles, please.” Samar had to give his upbringing credit for one thing: he had manners. 

She cut his sandwich diagonally so that there were two triangles and went to grab a plate to put it on. Once that was done, she brought him the plate and set it down in front of him, bowing as she did. “There you are, sir. One peanut butter and jam sandwich with the peanut butter smoothed on first, no crust, not toasted, and cut into triangles.” He giggled, making her grin widen. She walked over and sat down next to him, a sigh she didn’t mean to let out escaping.

He took a bite of his sandwich. Then he looked at her and spoke. Though it was hard for her to decipher what he was saying because of the peanut butter, she did eventually make it out. “Aren’t you hungry, too?”

Samar shook her head, though her stomach begged to differ. “No, it’s okay. I ate…” Come to think of it, it had been a long time since she’d eaten. This morning, maybe? But even that was debatable. She didn’t want to worry Finn, though. “…earlier.”

Finn put down the half of the sandwich he had been eating and picked up the one he hadn’t touched. Then he offered it to her. “Here.”

Her eyes widened and she instantly shook her head. “Oh, no thank you, sweetie. You need it more than I do.”

“Please, I want you to have it.” Finn was insistent, and Samar was touched by the fact that this little boy was going to so much trouble to make sure that she was fed.

So she did the only thing she could in that situation. She reached out and accepted it, grinning. “How’d you get to be so sweet?” Samar asked.  
He gave her a bright, goofy smile and shrugged. She started to eat her half of the sandwich afterwards. It wasn’t much, but it would work for a meal so early in the morning. And after she had finished, she realized she felt a little better, like she had a little more energy. Samar gently stroked the top of his head. “Thank you.” She told him before getting up. And then she headed into the bathroom again.

Reaching into the bottom cupboard she pulled out the green spare toothbrush she kept just in case she ever had a guest. Not that she’d ever thought that would be something she’d need to take into consideration, but it was better to be safe than sorry. Then she grabbed her yellow toothbrush from the cup on the counter. Once she had placed them both on the sink, she got out the standard white tube of toothpaste and put some on her toothbrush. She caught a glimpse of him in the mirror and turned to smile at him.

“Finn, do you usually wet your toothbrush before putting the toothpaste on or no?” Samar asked. It didn’t matter to her, but it might to him.

“Yes.” He nodded, and she did just that, making sure he could see it so that maybe tomorrow he could do it on his own.

“While you’re here, the green toothbrush is yours.” She explained, and he nodded, giving her his full attention. Samar handed him the green toothbrush and moved out of the way for him so they could both have access to the sink. She picked up her toothbrush and turned on the sink, running it under the water, but not enough to take the toothpaste off it. Together, they brushed their teeth side by side, taking turns to spit into the sink without getting in the way of each other, although because of his height she did have to lift him up to make that possible. Still, it all felt very natural. When they finished in the bathroom, she rinsed off her toothbrush and put it into the cup, stepping back so he could do the same. All she did was help him up so he could reach the cup. It wasn’t that tall, though, and once he got a bit taller he would likely be able to reach it, no problem. 

There was always the chance this was temporary, but right now, she didn’t want to think about that. So she thought about other things. Like the fact that her bathroom was pretty small. And the fact that she only had one bedroom. And the fact that he would have to wear the same outfit again tomorrow until she could get him more clothes. She could worry about those things tomorrow, though. “Come on, let’s go to sleep now, okay?” She told him, offering him her hand. He took it without needing more prompting than that. She turned off the light and led him over to the couch. “I’ll grab you a pillow and some blankets.” 

Finn’s tiny brow furrowed in worry, tightening his grip on her hand. “Can’t I sleep with you?” he whimpered. 

Samar’s heart melted and she could feel tears building in the back of her throat that she quickly pushed away. “Oh, of course Finn. If that will make you feel better. Absolutely.” She immediately turned toward her bedroom, and once there, she flicked the lamp on, filling the room with a dim, cozy light. At least the bed was big enough for both of them, for now. Though she’d need to figure out something more permanent if he ended up living with her.

“Why are the walls so empty?” Finn asked as he struggled to climb onto the bed. She walked over and helped him up.

“I guess I haven’t gotten around to decorating.” She said in response as she got into the bed as well. Samar glanced at the clock on the bedside table and saw that it now read three o clock. “Wow, it’s late, we should get some sleep.” She shifted so she was under the covers, and then turned to look at him. “If you need anything throughout the night, don’t hesitate to wake me, okay?”

Finn nodded. “Okay. Night, Samar.” He smiled gently, and she returned it. She tucked him in and looked him over to make sure he was comfortable. Then she closed her eyes. But she was aware of him snuggling against her, and it made her feel safer. And as a result, she was able to fall asleep easily and without nightmares for the first time in years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter, I swear to God. It was a lot of trouble, so I hope you guys enjoy it!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Samar realizes that she's late for work. Luckily, her team is understanding.

Samar woke up feeling happier and more refreshed than she could ever remember before this point, Finn snuggled into her side and sleeping soundly.  
Everything was perfect, until she realized that it was a lot brighter in the room than she was used to it being in the mornings. Oh God, what time was it?

Quickly but without waking Finn, she glanced at the clock on the bedside table.

8:57.

She was going to be so late for work.

Carefully, she got out of the bed and moved to get ready. She needed to change her clothes and shower. She had so much to do. But Finn was asleep right now, and she didn't want to wake him. Samar decided to wait until he was awake before she not only did what she needed to do, but also figured out what he needed. Going out into the main room, she went over to her purse and retrieved her phone. Until she got all of this sorted out, it couldn't hurt to send an email to Cooper to let him know she'd be late coming in today. With steady hands, the sleep had helped after all, she did just that and hit send. Then she turned around and found Finn standing there. In spite of her skills and her instincts she startled a little. "Hey, did I wake you?" She asked gently, putting down her phone.

Finn shook his head. "I got scared when I woke up and you weren't in the room." He explained almost shyly.

Samar smiled gently, apologetically. "I'm sorry, Finn. I'll try not to do that again without telling you first." She pressed a kiss to the top of his head and let him lean into her briefly. When she pulled back, she spoke again. "Come on, let's go get ready."

They got ready for the day and by the time they walked out the door, the sun was high in the sky.

 _Shit._ Samar thought to herself, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth absently. It was already 10:30. Cooper was going to be pissed, even if she had given him a heads up. She would worry about Cooper once she got to work, however, and focused on helping Finn into the car. Not that he needed much help, now that he was getting used to being in her car. She made sure he was strapped in before shutting the door. And then she went around to the driver's side, opened her door and got in, putting her purse in the passenger seat. She decided that, if Finn stayed with her permanently, she'd only let him sit in the passenger seat for special occasions; at least until he got older. It was safer that way.

She drove to the Post Office, driving more carefully than usual because she was aware of having another human being in the car.

When she walked into the office with Finn at her side, it felt like everyone in the room had turned to stare at her, though the only ones actually looking her way were Ressler, Liz and Aram. All three of her friends looked confused, but she knew she had to talk to Cooper before she did anything else. So she held her hand up in a hesitant greeting for her friends before starting up the steps to Cooper's office, Finn's hand holding tightly to hers. She swallowed hard when they reached Cooper's office. The door was closed, but she could see him in there at his desk. She didn't let her apprehension show on her face as she turned to Finn and knelt to his level. "Wait here, okay?" She asked, glad that she sounded calmer than she felt.

Finn looked nervous, but he nodded. "Okay, Samar." He gave her hand a squeeze and then let it go, and she felt like he took all of her courage with him when his hand left hers. But she had to do this, so she got up and knocked on the door. She waited for him to tell her to come in before she turned the knob, and entered the office.

"Do you want me to close the door, sir?" She asked.

"No, you don't need to, Agent Navabi." Cooper responded, and the way he said her name was how she knew she was in trouble. "You're two hours late. I know you sent an email, but I need an explanation." She opened her mouth to speak, but he continued talking. "An explanation, not excuses. And then I need you to get to work, the team needs you. I..." Cooper trailed off, and Samar's brows furrowed. When she realized he was looking just behind her, however, she had a feeling she knew what-or rather who-he was looking at. Samar turned to look, and sure enough, there was Finn. He had his arms wrapped around himself in a hug.

She turned away from Cooper to walk over and place her hand gently atop Finn's head. "Everything's all right, Finn. See that man down there on the computer? With the beard?" He nodded, and she kept speaking. "That's my friend Aram. How about you go and introduce yourself, and I'll be down in a few minutes. Can you do that?"

"Okay." Finn said, and with a glance Samar could only describe as nervous in Cooper's direction, he left the office. Then and only then did she turn back around and walk over to Cooper's desk. He sat down in his chair, and then gestured for her to sit in the other.

She did. Then, Samar told Cooper everything. How she had a bad feeling about Finn’s mother two weeks ago. How Finn had gone missing last night. How she had gone looking for him and found out that he had been running away to find her because of his neglectful mother. She told him all about the confrontation at the police station and taking Finn home with her late last night, neither of them getting much sleep. As she talked, she became aware that her eyes were stinging. But no tears spilled down her cheeks, thankfully. Crying in front of her boss would be mortifying. Cooper just sat quietly, listening, with a sympathetic look on his face until she was done.

When she finished, Cooper leaned forward and took one of her hands in both of his, startling her. "Samar, I think you need to take the rest of the week off." As she opened her mouth to protest, he cut her off again, only this time there was no hint of irritation in his tone. "Get all of this sorted out, get some proper sleep. I promise, we'll all still be here when you come back.”

"But you said the team needed me." Samar responded. The thought of rest, real rest, and actually having time to get Finn sorted out was tempting, but she was also concerned for her team.

"I did, yes, because they do. But I think he needs you more." Cooper looked at her. "Now get out of here, that's an order." But by the grin on his face, she knew he wasn't serious.

Samar smiled and stood up. "Yes, sir. And thank you." He squeezed her hand and then let her go, and she turned and exited the office. There were still tears in her eyes, at the very corners, and it was all she could do to hope they didn't spill down her face. She inhaled deeply, held it for a couple seconds, and then exhaled. Resting her hands on the railing, she looked down at the office and saw Aram pointing at something she couldn't see on the screen, showing it to Finn, saw Liz slightly behind Aram, looking on and smiling. And a little ways off, Ressler sat at his desk, fully focused on something on his laptop. The rush of emotions she felt in that moment overwhelmed her, and she felt tears sliding down her cheeks slowly. Her mind was a whirl of thoughts but the main one standing out above all others was 'How did I get so lucky? What have I done to deserve this kindness, this team, these friends?' Samar wiped at her eyes with her sleeve, but she couldn't seem to stop them from flowing.

Liz was looking at her now, and she knew that Liz could see the state she was in, because soon she was heading towards the stairs. Her actions went unnoticed by the two boys, who were enthralled by whatever was on the screen in that moment. Swallowing and keeping her eyes forward, Samar started down the stairs to meet her at the bottom. Once they were face to face, Liz silently took her hand, and Samar let her. She let Liz lead her away from the main part of the office and down a hall, so Finn wouldn't see her crying, and Samar was immensely grateful. She dabbed at her eyes with her sleeve and leaned against the wall, while Liz rested beside her.

Neither of them spoke for a while.

Finally, Samar composed herself, and met Liz's eyes. Then Liz spoke. “Isn’t that the boy from the Kenyon compound? What’s going on?” Her tone was curious rather than accusatory or suspicious, and Samar couldn't help comparing the woman before her now to the one Liz had been when she'd first joined the task force. Come to think of it, they had both changed a great deal since then. Samar told her exactly what she had told Cooper, glad to be able to share this with her team. She trusted them. And she was right to do so, she knew that. Liz reached out and placed her hand on Samar's shoulder. "I honestly don't think he could be safer with anyone than he is with you."

Samar smiled weakly but sincerely through her tears. "Thank you, Liz. It’s just…overwhelming. I don’t know anything about taking care of children. I barely take care of myself. I’m simultaneously terrified of him going back to his mother and of him staying with me permanently. I don’t even have anywhere for him to sleep. He’s wearing the same clothes he wore yesterday. He has to go to school. He-”

Liz gently cut her off by raising her hand. “Breathe, Samar. Everything will be fine, okay? One step at a time. And if you need any help, any help at all, I’ll be there in a heartbeat." Samar nodded, taking a breath that caused her body to shudder just a little with the force of it, sniffing. And Liz spoke again, reaching out to place her other hand on Samar's other shoulder. “It’s up in the air right now, that’s why it’s so terrifying. If you get custody, he’s bound to bring some of his clothes with him. You’ll buy him a bed and squeeze it in somewhere. You’ll figure it all out.”

Samar nodded. "Thank you, Liz." She murmured.

"Are you okay now?" Liz asked, concern in her tone.

"Yeah, I think so. I haven't eaten today, that's probably part of the reason." Samar didn't know why it was so easy to talk to Liz.

Liz smiled. "Come on." Then she headed back into the main office, and Samar followed after her. "Hey, guys, I'm going out to grab food and drinks. What does everyone want?" Everybody gave their orders and within minutes, Liz had headed out the door for the bagel shop a few blocks away, while those still left wordlessly set to making a space for them all to eat.

 

Samar sat in a chair at the 'table' they had made, though it was really just a couple of desks that nobody really used pushed together, Finn beside her. She looked up as Aram walked over. He looked like he wanted to say something, and she waited for him to do so. But instead, he just beamed at her, and reached out to squeeze her shoulder. Samar couldn't help grinning and perhaps even blushing slightly-if the heat she felt on her cheeks was anything to go by. She wondered if anyone would notice it, and hoped not. "Can I sit here?" He gestured to the chair on her other side.

She nodded. "Of course, by all means." She turned to look at Finn, who was grinning from ear to ear as he snuggled against her.

Aram went to sit down, but stopped. "I'm going to get Cooper." He said. "Don't let anyone take my seat, okay?" He looked at Samar as he said this.

Despite the serious look on his face, she couldn't help laughing quietly, briefly. "Of course." Then Aram all but ran up the stairs. Samar smiled as she caught Ressler's eye and he gave her a nod of acknowledgement before going back to his work. She watched Finn look around, and couldn't help smiling at the wide-eyed curiosity he held.

Five minutes later, Liz returned, bagels and coffees in hand. She set the bag down on the table they had made and moved to sit in the chair on Samar's other side that wasn't occupied by Finn.

"Don't even think about it, Keen!" Aram ran over, and Samar's smile widened. Liz held up her hands in a gesture of surrender and moved over to grab the bag to pass out the individual orders. Samar got up and grabbed two extra chairs, one for Ressler, and one for Cooper. Then she sat back down and accepted hers and Finn's food from Liz, handing Finn's plain, buttered bagel to him.

They all had their food, but before they started eating, Samar spoke up. "Okay. I think it's time for a formal introduction. Everyone, this is Finn." She looked at Finn. "You've met Aram and Liz. But this is Donald Ressler, and Harold Cooper." Finn waved shyly. Samar watched Ressler nod at him, watched a small smile spread on Cooper's face before vanishing. Then she settled down to eat her food, and the rest of them followed.

Samar looked around the circle at her teammates as she ate. She truly couldn't believe how lucky she'd gotten that they had accepted her so easily. Those first few days had been rocky, she'd thought they would never accept her, and yet here they all were now. Enjoying food together. She felt Finn tug on her sleeve and looked over at him. He was gesturing for her to lean down, so she did. She heard his voice in her ear, barely above a whisper. "I like them."

Samar smiled. "I like them too." She said in the same tone, and then she went back to eating.

When they had finished, Cooper stood up. "Alright, Agent Navabi, now that you've eaten I don't want to see you here for the rest of the week. Is that clear?"

Samar nodded. "Crystal, sir." She got up from her chair. Almost immediately, she was face to face with Aram.

"You had to know this was coming." He told her, and held open his arms.

"Well, I'm certainly not surprised." Samar said with a teasing grin, and held open hers. When he hugged her, she was less reluctant to hug him back this time around. When they broke off, he surprised her by holding his arms open for Finn and hugging him. When that was done, Liz hugged them both as well. Ressler walked over and patted Samar on the shoulder, which earned him a smile from her. Then she watched him kneel to Finn's level and shake his hand.

"A strong handshake is always a good sign." Ressler was smiling as he stood up. Samar didn't miss Finn's own smile as Ressler said this. And then she thought perhaps, if he stayed with her permanently, she'd bring him around here more often.

And then only Cooper was left. She knew it wasn't a permanent leave, that she'd be back as soon as everything with Finn was squared away. But it still felt that way at this present moment. He moved over to her slower than the others had because of his illness and his dependence on the cane. "Call us if you need anything." He said, and put his hand on her shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze.

She nodded and smiled. "I will. Thank you." Then, after some internal debating, she did something that surprised even herself. She reached out and hugged Cooper. He placed his hand on her back and held her close, and a few seconds later she pulled away. Reaching for Finn's hand once again, the pair of them left the Post Office.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Samar takes Finn shopping and gets some disturbing news.

Samar entered the large clothing store with Finn at her side. She heard Finn make a soft sound of surprise beside her, and she looked down at him. "Is everything okay buddy?"

"It's a really big store." He murmured, and she smiled.

"I know. Come on." They wandered around the store for about ten minutes, Finn picking out some shirts and pants, before they headed toward the fitting rooms. "Do you need help, Finn?”

"No thanks, Samar, I can do it."

"Let me know if you do."

Finn smiled and nodded before going into the fitting room with the clothes in hand.

Samar moved to sit outside it while Finn tried on the clothes he had picked out. She knew he would call her if he needed help. Her phone started to ring and she pulled it out of her pocket, checking the caller. It was the MPD. Swallowing, she got up and stepped away so Finn wouldn't hear before answering it. "Navabi."

"Agent Navabi, it's Officer Jackson. You told me to call you with any information?" She'd expected as much once she saw the caller.

"Yes, of course, what is it?" She tried to keep her voice calm, her tone hushed. It had to do with Finn's mother, she knew it. And she hated it.

"It's about Mrs. Westin." Officer Jackson said, sounding reluctant. And in that moment, Samar knew she had someone who knew how she was feeling about this whole matter. "She strangled herself in her holding cell with her belt." Samar felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. She hadn't liked the woman, but she would never wish this on anyone. Nor had she been expecting those to be the words out of his mouth. She didn't know what to say, so she said nothing. "He'll need to go into foster care, because we haven’t been able to find any other family and his mother didn't leave a will." And just like that, she felt like there was a heavy weight on her chest, pressing down.

Finally, she found her voice, the words she wanted to say. "Is it possible for him to stay with me? Permanently, I mean?"

The silence felt like it stretched on forever. "Yes, but that would be an extremely complicated process."

"Can I have some time to decide what to do?" Samar asked.

"Okay. You have 24 hours before we're required by law to start drawing up the foster care paperwork." He responded.

"Thank you." She murmured. Then she hung up the phone. It occurred to her that she needed to get back to Finn, but suddenly she felt like everything she had been worried about, everything she had been fearful of happening, was doing just that. She squeezed her eyes shut and exhaled deeply. She'd never wanted this to happen. Yes, she'd wanted Finn out of his mother's grasp, but not like this. Not at the expense of a life. How could she possibly do this? She didn't know the first thing about raising a kid full time. Not only that, but did she even have the time to commit to how long the process itself would take? She had wanted Finn to be safe and loved but she hadn’t actually anticipated being his sole guardian. She barely remembered to feed herself. She had never even gotten around to making her apartment feel like a home. She never let anyone close to her. And now she was going to share her life with a ten year old. She had to, right? She couldn’t possibly send him off into the foster care system. She just couldn’t abandon him like that, not after all he had been through, not after he had come looking specifically for her the night before. But, what if she failed? What if she messed up? That would be just as bad as if she had decided to leave him to the foster care system. And then she remembered Liz's words from just a few hours ago.

_' "Breathe, Samar. Everything will be fine, okay? One step at a time. And if you need any help, any help at all, I’ll be there in a heartbeat." '_

Almost immediately, her fingers started to dial Liz's number, then held the phone to her ear and waited.

"Hello?" She heard Liz's voice on the other end, and it took almost everything she had not to lose it. Calling her was a mistake. What if she was working and her call had just interrupted a case? She momentarily forgot how to speak once more, until Liz spoke again. "Samar, are you there?"

"Yeah, sorry, Liz, I shouldn't have called. You're at work, it's no big deal." She hated the way her voice shook. But she hoped Liz wouldn't notice.

Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. "What happened?"

Samar swallowed. "I...haven't really processed it yet. I don't know why I called, really.”

"Are you home? I can be there in thirty minutes." Samar smiled at the kindness of her friend, in spite of how grim everything was.

"No, we're buying Finn some clothes but I can be there in thirty minutes too.” She paused. “Thank you.”

"No need to thank me. See you soon."

Samar hung up after reciprocating the goodbye. Now the real challenge would be staying calm until she got to the apartment. She swallowed hard and headed back to the fitting room, pocketing her phone. She knocked lightly on the door. "Finn? Do the clothes fit?" Liz had heard something in her voice that had prompted her to ask what happened, and she hoped Finn wouldn't do the same. She hadn't figured out how she was going to tell anyone what she had just learned, let alone the one person it impacted the most.

The door opened and Finn came out with the clothes in his arms. "They fit." He looked up at her, and as his brows furrowed, she knew he could see something on her face. "...Samar? Is everything okay?"

Samar nodded, hoping she looked convincing. "Yeah, kiddo, everything's fine. But we need to head back now, okay?" She gently took some of the clothes from him so he didn't have to carry them all. Then they headed to the checkout, where she placed the clothes on the till and let the cashier ring them up.

"Samar?" She looked down at him, and he smiled sweetly. "Thank you for the clothes."

Again, she smiled in spite of the situation. "You're welcome."

 

They left the store shortly after that, with her holding the bag of clothes. Twenty minutes later when they arrived on her street, Samar saw Liz already waiting outside of her apartment building.

Finn waved at Liz. "What are you doing here, Liz?" His tone was excited.

Liz waved back. “Oh, I needed to talk to Samar about work stuff. I won’t take her from you for too long, I promise.” She said as Samar stepped past them to open the door that would take them into the main building. She didn't say much as they entered, and headed up the stairs. She unlocked her apartment door and stepped inside, leaving it open for Finn and Liz. "Hey, Finn, want to watch something on Netflix?" She asked gently. Liz closed the door behind them.

"What's a Netflix?" Finn asked, and Samar remembered that he had grown up in a cult. Samar pulled it up on the TV and showed it to him. "Oh." He said as he looked at the movies she went through, obviously in the 'Children and Family Movies' section. She picked one at random she thought he might like, How to Train Your Dragon 2, and then set the remote beside him, showing him which buttons did what. Once that was done, she stepped back and gestured for Liz to go into the bedroom with her.

She shut the door behind her, and Liz spoke. "Okay, now, I'm worried."

Samar all but collapsed down on the bed and put her head in her hands. Neither of them said anything as she tried to work up the courage to say the words. "His mother committed suicide." She hated saying them, because that really made them true. But they were out now. She heard Liz exhale sharply, felt the bed dip as Liz sat down beside her, felt a hand on her knee. And then she looked up. "I don't know how to tell him. I don't know what to do. I wanted him to be safe, but not like this, you know?"

Liz nodded. "Yeah, I completely understand.”

Samar shook her head, exhaling in apprehension. “How do you tell a ten year old that their mother ended her own life?" Would he even understand it? "He shouldn’t have to understand this, he’s only ten.”

Liz nodded in understanding, squeezing her knee. “But you have to tell him. I think the best way, is to tell him that she's passed away, and not how it happened. Just until he's older."

Samar knew that was the best way. "I think so too."

"Do you want me to stay?" Liz asked.

Samar did, more than anything. She really didn't want to do this alone. But he didn't know Liz that well. It had to be just her. "I appreciate the offer, but I think I should tell him by myself because he doesn't know you as well and I don't want to overwhelm him." She didn't want her friend to be offended, but it was true.

"Of course." Liz squeezed her knee again and stood up. "If you need anything, just call."

"Thanks." Samar said, and then Liz was heading out of the bedroom. Not at all ready for what she had to do, she got up and headed out there as bravely as she could, even though she felt terrified. Liz had shut the door behind her, leaving them alone. She walked over to sit down beside him on the couch. "Finn...I need to talk to you." She said, watching him pause the movie and turn his full attention to her. His eyes were wide and curious, and she felt a knot in her throat. "Your mother, she...she passed away."

Finn's blue eyes were wide with shock and sadness. Mostly shock, though. “She’s…gone? But we just saw her last night. I don’t understand. What happened? Samar, please tell me what happened.” The whimpering note to his voice broke her heart. Samar didn't do this a lot, especially now that she was a grown woman, but sometimes when she didn't know how to deal with something, she retreated into herself, and that was what she was doing now. But then Finn nudged her arm, bringing her back to the present. "Samar? My mom's dead? She's really dead?" His words made her lose it and she turned her head away so he didn't see it, even though he could more than likely hear it. She wasn't full on sobbing, but pretty close. He kept his hand on her arm. "It's my fault. Because I ran away, isn’t it?" She looked up and shook her head, trying to tell him no but unable to make her mouth form the words. "She thought I didn't love her." His face twisted into a grimace and suddenly tears were streaming down his face, his tiny body shaking with giant sobs. Samar's first instinct, even when she was crying, was to draw him into her arms and hug him close. He clung to her like his life depended on it.

Samar kissed the top of his head, her tears falling onto his curls. “It’s not your fault, baby. None of this is your fault.” He wrapped his arms tightly around her and buried his face in her side. “She knew you loved her, Finn. You’re the sweetest boy I’ve ever met, no one could doubt your love.”

"You really think so?" Finn whispered, looking up at her.

Samar nodded. "I do think so." Slowly, both of them stopped crying. "Do you want to finish the movie?" She asked tentatively, and he nodded, though he was very clearly still sad-understandably so. She shifted to grab the remote, and he snuggled even tighter into her side. She pressed play, keeping her arm wrapped around him.

 

By the time the movie was over, she'd made her decision. Glancing down at him, she saw him sound asleep, and she smiled. Carefully, she moved him onto a pillow and got up to go call Officer Jackson with what she had decided.  
"Jackson." He said when he answered the phone.

“Officer Jackson, this is Agent Navabi. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep him with me.” She was absolutely certain of her decision.

"Fantastic. Come by the station tomorrow and we can start drawing up the papers." Jackson told her, and she swore she could hear a smile in his voice.  
"I will." She said, and then they both hung up. She set her phone on the table and walked back to the couch, gazing down at a sleeping Finn with a contented smile on her face. She knew this would be difficult, but she was determined to give this little boy the childhood he deserved. Whatever happened, they would have each other.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Samar and Finn deal with the news of his mother's death.

Samar’s stomach rumbled and once again she was reminded of her inability to take care of herself, let alone a child. Neither of them had eaten since the bagels at the Post Office. And she didn’t really feel like dragging Finn back out to eat in public after all the emotional upheaval of the past couple hours. But the bare status of her cupboards hadn’t changed since the previous night. She moved to the kitchen, rummaged around and found an unopened box of pasta, sighing in relief when she remembered she also had some sauce in the fridge. She walked back over to Finn, and brushed some hair off of his forehead gently until he stirred awake. “Hey, kiddo. Are you hungry?”

He frowned. “Maybe a little, I guess.” She knew from experience that grief made the idea of food less appealing, but she was glad he seemed to realize he needed to eat.

“I’ll make some pasta. How does that sound?” she asked.

He nodded sleepily. “Okay. Thanks, Samar.” She was worried by his current level of apathy, but it was to be expected, she supposed.

“I’ll let you know when it’s ready.” She told him, walking back to the kitchen, pulling out a pot, and starting to boil some water. She needed to go grocery shopping as soon as possible, especially since she was going to have him living with her permanently. She opened the package while she waited and grabbed the sauce. As the water started to steam, she walked over and put the noodles into the pot. Samar wasn't expecting that action to cause some water to splash out of the pot and onto her arm. She swore quietly under her breath in Farsi and stepped back from the pot to run her arm under the cold water. When the pain had subsided, she walked back to the pot and slowly stirred the noodles around for a little while longer. She got two bowls out-funny how she had a lack of food, but an almost innumerable amount of dishes and cutlery- and brought them over. After straining the noodles carefully, she put enough for both of them into each bowl, and then set the pot back on the stove. Readying the sauce, she poured just enough on both portions. Then she brought the bowls into the living room, grabbing a couple forks on the way. "Food's ready." She murmured, sitting down beside him. He sat up, and she offered him one of the bowls and a fork. He took them. "Finn, talk to me." She murmured as she ate.

Finn looked up at her while taking a bite of his pasta, his expression thoughtful as he slowly chewed. Once he swallowed, he quietly spoke. “I’m glad I met you.”

Samar smiled, but she was certain it didn't reach her eyes. "Really?" She found that hard to believe, with how much uprooting she'd done in his life. She could very well be a large part of the reason his mother was dead. He nodded, and she smiled and ruffled his hair. "Well, thank you, I appreciate that. I'm glad I met you, too." Finn smiled as she said this, and she felt victorious. She knew a lot of things needed to be done, mainly the legal processes, but for the moment, she figured they were okay to stay where they were. They both finished eating, and Samar gently took the bowl from him and brought both of those and the forks to the sink to wash them. Finn got up and followed her over. He stayed by her side as she washed the dishes.

"Do you need help?" He asked innocently.

Samar smiled at his thoughtfulness. "I think I'm good, but thank you, buddy. Tell you what, if I need help, I'll let you know, okay?"

Finn nodded. "Okay." Samar finished up the dishes and dried off her hands. Then she walked back over to grab her phone and sat down on the couch.  
Finn climbed up beside her as she dialled Liz's number. She had to get straight to the point. "Hey, Liz." She said upon hearing her friend's voice on the other end of the line.

"Hi, Samar, is everything okay?" Liz asked, clearly concerned.

Samar nodded. "Yes, everything's fine." For the moment, anyway. "I was wondering if you could watch Finn tomorrow while I sort things out."

"I’m so sorry Samar, but I can’t miss work. Red just gave me a new case." Liz sounded genuinely apologetic. Well, that was Liz for you. If she deemed you worthy of her friendship, you had a friend for life.

Samar had figured as much. "It's fine, I'll figure something out." There was a slight commotion on Liz's end. Two voices: her voice and a deeper one that obviously belonged to a man, but so soft that she couldn't make out who it was. At least, not until she heard the voice speak into the phone.

"Samar, my dear." The voice wasn't extremely deep, but still deep, and she recognized it immediately. "How nice it is to hear your voice."

Of course. Somehow, she wasn't surprised. "Red. Why did you take Liz's phone?"

"Actually, she handed it to me." Red's tone was casual. "I couldn't help overhearing your current predicament, and I believe I can help."

Now Samar was intrigued. "You can? How?" Finn snuggled into her side again, and she wrapped her free arm around him.

"What time are you planning to go out tomorrow?" Red asked, sounding like he genuinely wanted to know.

In truth, Samar hadn't really picked a solid time. "I don't know. I was thinking eleven?"

"Fantastic. Kate will be there at eleven, then."

Samar's brows furrowed. "But, you don't know where I live."

"I can get that information, Samar. Don't worry about a thing. Just rest your pretty little head and know that he'll be in good hands." And then he hung up. Samar hung up, too, shaking her head. Raymond Reddington was a real piece of work. But, like Liz, she knew that if he considered you a friend, you would be safe with him. Always.

She looked down at Finn as he yawned. "Tired?" She asked, and he nodded. "Come on, neither of us got much sleep last night. What do you say we get ready for bed?" She offered Finn her hand, and he took it. The pair of them got ready for bed and then settled back onto the couch. "Want to watch another movie?" She asked. Snuggling against her, he nodded. Picking up the remote, she put on Lilo and Stitch.

Neither spoke, they just watched the movie. Well, Samar was only half watching the movie. She couldn't stop thinking about Finn's mother. Not that she would ever want to, but she knew she couldn't replace Dawn in Finn's life. Even if she had been neglectful, she had still been his mother, and that meant something. She stroked her fingers through his hair absently as she tried to focus on the movie. But it was half over by this point, and she'd been so lost in her own thoughts that she had no idea whatsoever what was going on. However, she tried to pay attention to what was happening now, with little success. She still didn't think she could do this. What if something went wrong? Her job was hectic, what if he got hurt as a result? What if she made a mistake? What if Finn regretted coming to her someday? What if he blamed her for his mother’s death? She knew that Finn was a sweet boy and that that was unlikely, but she couldn’t stop worrying. Not to mention she already blamed herself a little. The guilt was clawing at her inside her chest. She didn’t know what it was like to be part of a happy family, so how could she give that to Finn? It was unlike her to be so consumed with worry over uncontrollable things, but she was going to be responsible for another human life when she could barely remember to feed herself and get enough sleep. She'd dealt with a lot in her life, but this might just be too much for her to handle on her own. By now it was taking all of her self control not to completely lose it. She had to be strong for Finn, so that was just what she would do, it was all she could do.

By the time the movie ended, she felt terrible, not to mention that she had missed most of the movie as a result of her musing. But on the bright yet dim side, they were both ready for bed, and therefore could just head straight there now. Sure, it was still early, but neither of them had gotten much sleep the night before, so she didn't think the early night would be an issue. "Ready for bed?" She asked softly, stroking his hair absently. He nodded. She got up and offered her his hand. Finn took it and stood up.

Neither one spoke as they walked into the bedroom-if Samar had to guess the reason, she would say it was because they had no idea what words to use to break the silence that had fallen over them. A blanket of grief that neither of them could escape from. She pulled back the covers of the bed for him and waited to see if he needed help to get up-he didn't-before she tucked him in and then moved around to her side of the bed. She turned off the lamp and lay on her side with her back to him, unsure of what to say. Well, for starters, "Goodnight, Finn." Samar whispered, uncertain if he could even hear her with how quietly she spoke the words.

Finn's tiny hand tapped her on the shoulder. She turned to face him. Since it wasn't quite pitch black in the room yet, she could clearly make out his tiny features, his innocent face. "Ohana means family." He quoted, and she vaguely remembered that being a staple of the movie they had just watched. "Family means nobody gets left behind, or forgotten."

Smiling gently, she kissed his forehead. "That's right, Finn." She murmured, and then Samar fell asleep facing him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Samar gets to the paperwork, and receives a little extra help.

Samar awoke in the middle of the night. Everything was dark and still. She wasn’t sure what had woken her. But suddenly she heard a whimper coming from Finn’s side of the bed. His little body jerked in his sleep and she knew that was the reason she woke up. Maybe she did have some mothering instincts after all. Or maybe she hadn’t until she started taking care of Finn. Either way, she was glad to have it now. She reached over and shook him. “Finn, honey, wake up.” She murmured. But he didn’t. He just kept jerking and whimpering. Whatever the nightmare was about, it had to be a bad one. Right when Samar became worried, he jolted awake with a cry of fear. His eyes shot open and as soon as he saw her, he seemed to calm down. She exhaled silently, but her relief lasted only a fraction of a second before he was clutching at her shirt, pulling himself closer, curling into her, sobbing into the nook between her neck and shoulder. She wrapped her arms around him, holding him close and soothing him as best as she could. “Finn, sweetheart. Shhhh. It’s okay.” She whispered softly in his ear.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He managed to get out between sobs.

“Baby, what are you sorry for?” Samar asked, confused.

“The bomb. I killed you.” He let out a wail of terror and pain.

Samar’s heart broke as she held him even tighter, understanding what his nightmare must have been. The day they met at the Kenyon compound when she had talked him out of setting off the bomb. “Shh, no you didn’t, Finn. I’m right here. I’m alive. I’m not going anywhere.” She pressed her lips to his hair. “I’m right here. It was just a nightmare. I’m right here. I’m right here.” She kept repeating it until his sobs began to gradually subside. She took his hand and placed it over her heart, letting him feel its strong, steady beat. “See?” She murmured, looking at him. “Trust me, I’m not going anywhere any time soon.”

Finn nodded, throwing his arms around her neck and holding her. She lay back down, and they fell asleep again like this, with his arms wrapped around her neck and hers holding him protectively against her.

 

When Samar awoke again, it was morning, and there was someone else in the apartment. She could hear them moving about just outside the bedroom. In the kitchen, she realized. Carefully, she untangled Finn’s arms from around her neck and climbed out of the bed to go investigate. On the way out, she grabbed her gun.

An older woman, in her sixties at least, but she was still spry, stood there in the kitchen. She was putting food into the fridge and pantry. Samar’s brows furrowed and she cocked her gun at the stranger. The woman looked up, the ghost of a smile on her lips. “Kate Kaplan, dearie. Good morning.” Her tone was similar to that of a grandmother, but different. Samar remembered her conversation with Red from yesterday, how he’d said ‘Kate’ would be by at eleven. Slowly, she lowered her gun.

“How did you get in here?” Samar asked, watching her put groceries away. Well, that made things easier on her. Now she didn’t have to go shopping for groceries and could focus on the legal matters that awaited her today.

The smile widened. “For as long as you’ve known Raymond, I’m surprised you have to ask.”

Enough said.

“Is the lock still usable?” Samar knew enough about picking locks and breaking in to know that once someone picked a lock, it usually didn’t work any longer.

Mr. Kaplan nodded. “Don’t worry, I didn’t pick the lock. I used your spare key. It’s back in its usual place just so you know.”

Samar didn’t have the slightest idea what to make of the woman before her. “Well, that’s good to know.” With those words, she walked back into the bedroom to shake Finn gently awake. “Finn, I have to go out for a little while.” She said when he awoke. She helped him out of the bed and walked with him out into the kitchen. When he saw Kate, he huddled into Samar’s side. “This is Kate, she’ll be looking after you while I’m gone.” Kate got down to his level, which made Samar feel even more comfortable around her, and held out her hand. “Kate, this is Finn.” She introduced.

“Hello, dear. It’s a pleasure to meet you. Are you hungry? I brought ingredients to make pancakes.” She asked, and he nodded shyly. “I’ve got everything under control here, Samar. You can go do what you need to do.” She met Samar’s eyes, and Samar saw the kindness there.

“Thank you.” Samar was stunned by her kindness, but not in an unpleasant way.

Kate smiled again. “Dearie, it’s the least I can do. Raymond thinks very highly of you.” Samar smiled and headed back into the bedroom to change and shower, closing the door behind her. Finn didn’t need to, he could stay in his pyjamas all day if he wanted to. Samar hopped into the shower. When that was done, she dried off and dressed in a blue blouse and jeans, wanting to look professional. Walking back out, she smiled as she watched Finn watch Kate make pancakes.

“Okay. I’m going now, I shouldn’t be gone long.” Samar said, heading to the door.

“Without eating? I don’t think so.” Kate said, and Samar froze.

“Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.” Finn added, and she turned to look at both of them.

“I’m in a rush.” Samar tried to protest, but it was clear neither of them was going to budge on the matter. In truth, she was unbelievably touched by their concern.

“You need a clear head, Samar.” Kate looked at her. “Trust me, the errands you need to run will still be there after you’ve had breakfast.” She also appreciated that Kate didn’t mention exactly what errands she was going to run. With a resigned sigh, but a smile that gave how she really felt about the matter away, Samar moved to sit beside Finn at the counter.

“Do you need help?” Samar asked, not used to sitting around doing nothing while someone else cooked.

“I’m fine, but thank you.” Kate responded, and ten minutes later all of them were eating pancakes slathered with syrup. Samar had to consciously focus on not sighing as she ate the first bite of the warm pancakes that Kate had made, and she was glad that they hadn’t let her rush out the door. Not that she could’ve, anyway, not when she still had to brush her teeth. She was the first one done and she brought her plate and cutlery to the sink to wash it. “Leave it, Samar, I’ll deal with it.” Kate said immediately.

“I couldn’t ask you to do that.” Samar stared at her.

“You didn’t. I offered. Go finish getting ready.” Kate said firmly but there was no venom to her words.

Samar nodded and went to go brush her teeth. Once she had done that, she walked back out to kiss the top of Finn’s head. She smiled. “Thank you for everything, Kate. Again.”

Kate nodded, but she was smiling. “Any time, Samar.” Samar headed over to grab her purse, and then walked out the door of her apartment.

 

Samar’s heart was beating out of her chest as she walked toward the police station’s doors. She knew she needed to be calm, but what if something went wrong? What if Finn was taken from her? He wouldn’t understand. No. She absolutely couldn’t think like that. They had no reason to take Finn from her. That thought in her head, she bravely walked up the stairs and into the station.

 

The paperwork took a while, but Samar had been expecting that. She drove back to her apartment, trying to wrap her head around the fact that she now had full custody of Finn.

But now that the paperwork was done with, there were at least three more issues that needed to be taken care of.

One, her apartment was meant for one person, not two. So she’d need another bedroom.

Two, there was the issue of Finn’s education. She assumed he hadn’t gotten much other than 'The Gospel according to Justin Kenyon’ while he was with them, and probably not much when he was back with his mother, either.

Three, Samar’s job.

There was so much to do, and she had no idea how to go about any of it. Silently, she pulled the car over to the side of the road.

Samar put her head in her hands. The laundry list of things she needed to do seemed to run in circles around her brain. Not only that, but Cooper had told her to take the week off. She couldn’t even go to work. Not that she would even consider work when there were so many other things to be done.

Samar’s fist came down on the wheel. Not hard enough to damage it, but hard enough to cause a large sound to come from it. Before she could even really register what was happening, she was crying, her head pressed just so against the steering wheel. She hadn’t planned on crying today. Everything was going so well, it didn’t make sense why she would even be crying in the first place.

 _You’re overwhelmed, it’s perfectly normal._ Her conscience responded. _I’d be more surprised if you weren’t reacting at all, with the amount of stress you’re under right now._

She knew this was true. But she also knew that she needed to get home. To Finn. “I need to pull myself together.” She said aloud, her words shattering the silence of the car, wiping furiously at her eyes. “I’ve dealt with worse than this.” She exhaled sharply, put the car in drive and continued back to her apartment.

 

She entered the apartment to find Mr. Kaplan sitting with Finn, playing what looked and sounded like 'Go Fish’, Red on the phone nearby. He looked up when she entered. “Ah, here she is now. Goodbye.” And then he hung up the phone abruptly. “Hello, Samar.” His tone was casual. “I bought you a larger apartment.”

She blinked. “What’s wrong with this one?” The look he gave her said it all. “Thank you.” God, she was getting emotional again. She’d just gotten past this before driving back here, she didn’t want to have to deal with it again.

Red walked over and placed his hand on her shoulder. “What do you say we take a little walk?” He suggested softly.

Samar nodded, appreciating the gesture. “I think that’s a good idea.” She murmured, and the pair of them headed out.

 

“How did the paperwork go?” Red asked as they moved in an almost tandem along a sidewalk.

“It took a while, but other than that, it went off without a hitch.” She responded, unfazed by the chill on her cheeks from the wind.

“Good, I’m glad to hear it.” There was a beat. “So, what’s the problem?” Samar was shocked. Was she that transparent?

It was at least a good few minutes before she spoke again. “This is all so much to take in.” She admitted once she found the words, moving over to sit on a nearby bench. Red walked over, too, sitting down. His body was turned towards her, and he seemed to be giving her his full attention. This encouraged her to keep going. “I mean, I’m used to being on my own, looking after myself in my apartment. I’ve never had a kid to look after.” Samar swallowed, looking away from him, straight ahead. “I mean, I barely remember to look after myself, for God’s sake. How on Earth am I supposed to look after a ten year old child? And then there’s still the matter of school.”

“I saw to Dembe’s education for years.” Red spoke, his tone contemplative. He didn’t look away from her. “I could do the same for Finn, if you would allow me to. If you want me to.”

“Really?” Samar kept her gaze straight ahead, not trusting herself to look at him right now.

His hand rested gently on her wrist. “Of course.”

“I wouldn’t want him to be with strangers.” Samar said immediately, and a faint smile crossed her lips at how much she sounded like a mother. At least, she thought she did.

“He’d have only the best.” Red’s tone remained calm, unchanging, and finally she did look at him. “Samar. Surely by now you know that I will go above and beyond for the people I call my friends. Without hesitation.”

She had definitely figured this out. A larger grin came to her features. “I’m a friend now, am I?” Her tone was teasing.

“That’s what I said, isn’t it?” Red asked, causing her to laugh. He smiled at the sound.

“Thank you, by the way.” Samar told him. “For this, and for the new apartment. And for getting me out of there before I could lose it in front of Finn. I don’t want to cry in front of him if I can help it.”

“I understand.” Red nodded. “You’re under the impression that the boy has been through enough already without you making it worse, yes?” At her startled expression, he smiled. But there was little humor in it, and more sadness. “I’ve had a child, too, Samar. I know how it is. You don’t want to burden them with your troubles, and as such you end up holding it all in until one day it just bursts like a dam. And by that point, once you start…”

“You don’t think you’ll ever stop.” Samar finished without meaning to, meeting his gaze head on.

“Exactly.” She was shocked by the seriousness in Red’s expression. He stood up, stretching. “Are you ready to go back inside? Because if not, there’s a nice little stand nearby that makes the best hot chocolates. I would’ve suggested ice cream, but hot chocolate feels more appropriate for this nippy weather.” To emphasize his point, he pulled his jacket tightly closed and zipped it up. He offered her his hand.

“Hot chocolate would be nice.” Samar responded, taking his hand and letting him pull her to her feet.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Samar and Red's coffee date.

Samar sipped her hot chocolate, letting the sweet taste lift her mood, letting the heat warm her entire body. "This was a good idea, thank you." She spoke up after taking another sip of her drink, looking at Red, who sat across the table from her.

Red smiled slightly. "Well, nothing warms the spirit like a warm drink on a cold day."

Samar bit her lip, warring with herself to ask the question on her mind. "Red, you told me on the bench that you had a child. Can you...tell me about them?"

Red's hands clenched tighter around his cup, and Samar almost told him that he didn't have to. But he spoke before she could. "Her name was Molly. She loved doing ballet, and I never missed a recital or performance."

Samar reached across the table and took his hand. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked." She knew from his use of past tense that his daughter was likely no longer around, and she deeply regretted asking about anything to do with that part of his life. She didn't feel like she had the right.

He looked startled for a bit, but then he squeezed her hand. "It's all right, Samar. I don't get to talk about her often. People prefer to see me as this untouchable legend."

"Well, for the record, you can talk about it with me. Whenever you need to." This slipped out before she could stop it.

Red smiled genuinely. Though it was a small one, Samar still felt a flutter of victory in her chest. "Thank you, Samar. I appreciate that."

Samar beamed at him. "Well, you went to all this trouble to make me feel better, I figured it was only natural for me to return the favour."

"Making you feel better was hardly trouble." He countered, and she blushed in spite of herself.

"What do you know about my brother?" She asked, mostly curious. "I mean, you said you knew everything about me."

"Not you specifically." Red corrected. "I believe I said 'I know everything about the people who are tasked with finding me'. I know you had a younger brother and that he was killed in Pishin by Walid Abu Sitta, but other than that, I don't know anything. I didn't dig into your childhood, don't worry."

She exhaled a small sigh of relief. Then she met his eyes. "The last time I spent more than an hour around a child was my brother." Red nodded and smiled in a way that she could only describe as encouraging. "But I know I can't talk to Finn like he's my little brother, because he isn't. He's...I guess he's my son now." Actually voicing that was absolutely terrifying.

"Samar, my dear. I know you think you're unfit to be a mother for any number of reasons." Red's tone was soft as he addressed her. "But Finn thinks the world of you. He couldn't stop talking about how great you were and everything you've done for him. You may not think you're going to be a good mother to him, but he does. And if you want my opinion, I do too."

"Really?" Samar responded, her voice barely above a whisper. Red nodded and gave her hand another gentle squeeze.

"And if you need help with anything, whether it concerns Finn, or it concerns your own life, you don't just have the task force behind you. You have me as well."

"Thank you." Samar murmured, smiling. Her gaze went to their still entwined hands and she felt her cheeks go warm as she pulled her hand back. He did the same. She reached for her drink and sipped it again, but now it was just warm. Her heart was fluttering in her chest, which was strange, especially for her.

They didn't say much after that, but she felt a lot closer to him as a result of it.

 

"So I wake up with a massive headache, there's a bird on my head and my necktie hanging from the ceiling fan, which is moving." He said as they entered the apartment arm in arm. She laughed, unable to stop herself.

"What did you do after that?" Samar asked in between her laughter.

"Well I didn't stick around, if that's what you're asking." Red responded, causing her to laugh again.

She looked over as Finn approached them. "Hey, little man."

"Did you go on a date?" Finn blinked innocently up at them.

"No." Samar said at the same time Red said "Kind of." Again, Samar ducked her head slightly, flushed.

But not enough to miss Finn gesturing for Red to get down to his level. "Don't you even think about hurting her." The seriousness in his tone both startled and flattered Samar.

"Never." Red told Finn, causing Samar's cheeks to grow warmer. "I wouldn't dream of it." Finn nodded, satisfied, as he moved over to continue playing cards with Mr. Kaplan. Red, on the other hand, stood to his full height once more and turned to face her.

"Thank you. This was fun." She offered.

"Yes, it was. We should do it again, sometime." Red smirked in his signature way, but this time it didn't make her roll her eyes.

"Maybe, if I can get time." Samar told him, thinking of Finn and glancing over at him.

"I would suggest leaving him with Kate, but she has a job too. We could always bring him with us. Coney Island?" Red offered, and her eyes widened.

"You're really set on this, aren't you?" Samar murmured, already feeling herself start to relent.

"It'll be fun." was all Red said in response.

"There's too much to be done, I don't know if I'd ever have time for it." Samar told him.

"Well, I already told you I'd see to Finn's education. I bought you a new apartment, and can get people to move your furniture in at your word. And if I'm not mistaken, you have the week off work." Red spoke. "I'm not saying today, Samar. I'm saying in a couple of days."

Samar nodded. "Okay. I'd like that."

Red's smile was bright. "Fantastic. Now that that's out of the way, there is the little problem of your furniture. I didn't buy anything because I knew you had some. But it's all a matter of deciding what you would like to take, or if you would like all new furniture."

"I'd like to keep the couch." Samar gestured to the one Mr. Kaplan and Finn were currently sitting on. "And the bed. But as for everything else, I think new furniture would be a good idea."

"Finn wants his bedroom to be space themed." Mr. Kaplan said without looking up from the card game. Finn nodded enthusiastically.

"That can be arranged." Samar said with a fond grin in his direction. Then she turned her attention back to Red. "Can you get them to move the bed and the couch out tomorrow? Say, noon or one?"

Red nodded. "Of course. Just give me a minute." He pulled out his phone and hit redial. Samar started to tell him that he didn't have to do that right now, but stopped herself. It was charming. Instead, she walked over and knelt by the couch. "What are you playing?"

"Go Fish." Finn responded. "Kate taught me how to play." Samar grinned brightly at this. Soon, Red was coming over and leaning on the arm of the couch. It scared Samar, not only how domestic it was, but how used to it she was already. It wasn't good to get attached. Sure as far as she knew, she wasn't going anywhere-and now having Finn here would likely increase her chances of Mossad not moving her. But there was still the fear of her being moved elsewhere regardless of the life she had built, the little boy that was in her care as of today.

She was pulled out of her thoughts when Finn's stomach growled. "You hungry, buddy?" She asked, and he nodded.

Kate immediately got up. "I'll make something. Do either of you want some?" She looked from Samar to Red and back.

"Sure." Samar nodded. After all, Kate had gone to so much trouble to go shopping for the food, it seemed like it would be a waste not to have any.

"I could eat." Red agreed. Kate nodded in acknowledgement and moved into the kitchen. Shortly afterwards, Red got up, hanging up the phone. "I'm going to go help Kate." He said, and Samar nodded. After he walked into the kitchen, Samar sat down with Finn.

"He's nice." Finn said finally, nestling against her side. "Do you like him?"

"I do." Samar confided. "He's a good man."

"Do you think you'll go on another date with him?" Finn's eyes were innocent.

"We're planning one, yes." She wouldn't admit it was a date to Red, but it was easy for her to do so to Finn.

"I'm glad. You deserve to be happy, Samar." Finn's sincerity made her tear up, but for the first time they weren't sad tears.

"Well, having you here with me makes me happy, kiddo." Samar murmured, holding him close.

"Being here with you makes me happy, too." Finn murmured as he stayed snuggled against her. That reminded her, she hadn't yet told Finn that he was staying with her permanently now. But she didn't have time to do so before Mr. Kaplan was calling out to let them know that supper was ready. Both of them got up and headed over to the dining table, where Red and Mr. Kaplan were setting out the food. Chicken and potatoes, by the look of it.

"This looks fantastic." Samar said as she sat down at the table. Once they had all gotten their food, they started to eat, and no one said anything as a result.

"So where are you taking Samar on your next date?" Finn spoke, and his blunt tone caused Samar to start coughing in surprise.

Red, however, just looked amused. "We were thinking Coney Island." He said.

Finn looked confused. "What's that?"

"It's an amusement park." Red explained. "You'll like it."

This perked Finn up. "You're bringing me?!"

"Of course, Finn!" This time it was Samar who spoke. "You're a part of my life, too." She ruffled his hair affectionately, causing him to smile. "It wouldn't be too soon, of course. We were thinking in a couple of days."

"It sounds fun!" Finn's enthusiastic tone caused Samar's heart to soar. The four of them went back to eating, and now there was an air of excitement and contentment around the table. As expected, the food tasted as good as it looked. Not that Samar had expected anything less from Kate.

Eventually, all the food was gone. After putting the dishes away, Kate smiled at Samar and Finn. "I think it's time we head out." She said, and Red nodded in agreement.

"Thank you for all of your help today, both of you." Samar told them earnestly.

"You're welcome, dearie." Mr. Kaplan was smiling, which had to be a first in the time Samar had known her.

"Of course, Samar." Red told her with a smile.

"Kate?" Finn asked innocently. "Will you play cards with me again sometime?"

Kate's smile grew wider. "I think that can be arranged." She headed to the door.

Red started to follow her, but stopped in front of Samar. She expected him to say something. He didn't. Instead, he leaned in and kissed her forehead while gently cupping her cheeks. "Thank you for a nice day, Samar." He murmured, and then followed Kate to the door. Samar was aware that her cheeks had grown hot again as her and Finn turned to watch Red and Kate leave.

Samar found herself grinning from ear to ear, as she wondered how she had gotten so lucky as to have such amazing people in her life.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Samar and Finn move in to their new place, and there is more Navabington fluff.

Samar still couldn't wrap her head around the fact that this was actually happening. She was actually moving to a new place. A bigger place, one that would be big enough for Finn and herself, one where they wouldn't have to share a bed. And Red was the one to thank for that. He had also arranged a moving truck, and said truck was currently behind them as they drove. It was carrying the couch and the bed. Samar thought back to when she had told Red that those were the only two pieces of large furniture she wanted to take with her.

There were a few small boxes in the back, carrying her dishes and utensils, hers and Finn's toothbrushes. Not anything large, just small things she figured they would need. She smiled over at Finn, who was sitting in the passenger seat to mark the special occasion. "Are you excited, buddy?" She asked. Finn nodded, smiling back at her. "Good, I'm glad." Samar added, pulling into the driveway of the house Red had told her to come to. To say it was larger than her apartment would be a huge understatement. It wasn't exactly a mansion, but it had two stories. She parked the car and got out, coming face to face with Red, who was holding the door for her. "You didn't have to do all of this, you know." She told him shyly.

"Of course I did." Red told her with a smile.

"That's not all he did." Samar was startled as she turned to see Aram, Liz, Ressler and Cooper all standing there.

Samar blinked, startled. "What are you guys doing here?" She asked.

"Isn't it obvious? We're helping you move in." This time it was Ressler who spoke.

"Alright." Cooper broke the brief silence. "Let's get started."

 

Two hours later, Samar and the rest of the team, plus Finn, Red and Dembe of course, were all sitting in the living room. Samar, Red and Finn sat on the couch that was brought from her old place, and the rest of them were all settled on various pieces of furniture. Liz was in the kitchen ordering pizza.

"My room is so cool." Finn gushed to both of them, causing Samar to grin.

"Is it space themed?" She asked, and he nodded.

"Just like I wanted it." Finn looked up at her. "Wanna see it?"

"Sure, buddy." Samar said and let him take her up the stairs. The room was fully space themed, and Samar had to admit she was very impressed by all the work that had gone into it. "Did you do this?" She asked, turning to look at Red, who had followed them up the stairs.

"I know people." He responded simply, and there was her answer. Not that she really should've expected anything less from Red. "Now, would you like to see your room, Samar?" She focused her attention on him after he said this.

She nodded. "Lead the way." Could he hear the slight note of shyness in her voice? She hoped not. Red nodded and headed out of the room. "Do you want to come along, Finn, or do you want to stay here in your room?"

Finn took her hand. "I wanna stay with you." She smiled a little as he spoke the same words he'd said a couple days ago, when she first brought him back to her apartment to sleep. The pair of them followed Red next door. She was glad that she wouldn't be far from Finn, just in case he needed anything during the night.

"Kate picked the color scheme out." Red told them as they entered the room. It wasn't over the top in the slightest, but there were more things in her new bedroom than there had been in her old one. Her eyes fell on the burgundy bed sheets, and she smiled as she looked at Red.

"All of it?" She asked with an amused smile and a raised brow.

Red's gaze went to the blankets. "Okay, maybe I helped. A little. But your room needed color."

"It looks good, Samar." Finn said with a bright smile.

She turned to him, but before she could say anything, Liz's voice rang through the house. "Pizza's here!" And just like that, Finn zipped out of the room and down the stars, causing Samar to laugh softly as she turned back to face Red.

He had taken off his hat and looked almost nervous. "Be brutally honest with me. What do you think? I know I have a tendency to be over the top sometimes. If it's too much..."

"Red." Samar cut him off, stepping towards him. "I love it. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me."

"Well, it's their loss." He also stepped closer to her, and reached out. But instead of flinching away, she welcomed the feeling of his fingers on her cheek. And it was in this moment that Samar made her move, closing the distance between them and pressing her lips to his. She felt Red tense up, and got worried that she had moved too fast, that she had made a mistake. Sure, she wasn't usually this self conscious, but Raymond Reddington was not your average man. So she started to pull away, but Red kept his hand on her cheek. "Samar, don't." He murmured, and she could feel his breath on her face.

"Don't what?" She was aware that her voice was just as quiet as his.

"Don't stop. Don't be afraid to feel something." Red didn't take his eyes off her.

"Easier said than done." She told him. "Believe me, I want to. Mossad taught me a lot, but not this."

"I haven't felt anything like this in a long time." Red kept his hand on her cheek. "Maybe we can learn together." He offered.

Samar felt her cheeks grow hot as he said this. "I'd like that." She told him, and then she kissed him again. When she broke the kiss, she only did so because she needed the oxygen, and she knew he probably did as well.

He twined some of her curls around his fingers absently. "I believe Lizzie said the pizza has arrived?" Red asked, and she nodded. "Well, then, shall we?" He gestured for her to go out first, and she did just that. He didn't hold her hand, but his fingers did brush hers as they went down the stairs.

"Smells great." She said as she reached the bottom of the stairs. "What kind of pizza did you order?" Samar asked turning her attention to Liz.

"I got one cheese and one pepperoni." Liz said, and as her gaze went from Samar to Red, her brow rose and the corners of her mouth twitched up in a smirk. They hadn't done anything salacious, and yet Samar felt her cheeks flush anyway. "So help yourselves." Samar moved over to grab a slice of cheese pizza, while Red moved towards the pepperoni. "So, you and Red, huh?" Samar glanced at Liz as she spoke, flushing more deeply.

"We're taking things slow." Samar responded.

"I think it's cute. You two work well together." Liz told her, beaming.

"So I'm not stepping on your toes?" Samar asked in concern.

Liz stared pointedly at her. "I told you, my toes are fine." Samar smiled and moved back over to sit next to Finn and eat her pizza. Everyone was eating, and as a result, so one was saying much. Finn was on her left side, Red was on her right. Samar was content, but that wasn't hard when her team was as great as they were.

She was surprised to feel a brief touch on her lower back while everyone was focused on their food, and she glanced over to see the corner of Red's mouth turned up in a slight smile. He rose his brow, like he was silently asking if it was okay, and she had no problems nodding her assent. But the nod was almost imperceptible. She turned her gaze to the rest of the team, and caught Liz rolling her eyes, an exasperated smirk on her face. This, in turn, made Samar smile, too.

 

Soon the pizza was gone. "Do you need anything else, Samar?" Ressler asked, looking at her.

She shook her head, smiling. Red hadn't moved his hand. "No, thank you, I think I'm good. I really appreciate all of the help, though. Thank you." This was directed to everyone.

"Of course." This time Cooper spoke. "I think I'm going to head out. Charlene's expecting me back soon." Samar nodded, smiling.

"I'm going to go, too." Ressler agreed. Aram followed Ressler and Cooper out after giving her a brief hug goodbye. Now it was herself, Liz, Red, Finn, Kate and Dembe.

Liz glanced at Red and Samar on the couch, and then turned her attention to Finn. "Mr. Kaplan, didn't you say there was an ice cream place nearby?" She spoke thoughtfully.

"I did." Kate responded.

"I think we should take Finn out for ice cream." Liz watched Finn's eyes light up as she said this.

"I can drive." Dembe agreed.

Finn turned to Samar. "Is that okay?"

Samar got exactly what Liz was doing and gave a brief, grateful smile before nodding to Finn. "Of course it is. You ate your supper, didn't you?"

Finn grinned brightly and hugged her. Then he jumped up, but stopped and turned to look at her. "Aren't you coming?"

"I still have some things to unpack." Samar responded evenly. It wasn't technically a lie, though she doubted she'd get much unpacking done if Red had anything to say about it.

"And I'd like to help her." Red added, startling Samar.

Liz looked about ready to burst into laughter. "Okay, well, you two have fun with that." She said, and then Finn, Liz, Dembe and Kate were leaving the house. For a couple moments, there was just silence. Then it occurred to her that she should break it. "Liz figured us out already."

She didn't know what to expect from Red when she told him that. What she didn't expect was for him to smile. "I'm not surprised. It is her job to be observant, after all." Red reached for her hand and entwined their fingers, and then, with his free hand, stroked his fingers over her cheek and she couldn't help sighing as her eyes fluttered closed. "I suppose I'll owe her after this, though." He murmured, and she opened her eyes to meet his.

"Considering it's my kid she took out for ice cream so we could have some alone time, I think I'm the one who will owe her." Samar mused, leaning in to kiss him gently on the lips. Red responded the second her lips touched his, hands gently moving to rest on her hips. But he didn't try to touch her, just used the placement of his hands to keep her close. And while Samar enjoyed it very much, she knew that there were still things she needed to do before Finn got back. So after one more kiss to Red's lips, she started to pull away, unable to stop herself from laughing as Red made a sound of protest and reached for her. "I have to clean up, and finish unpacking." She said apologetically.

Red got up as well. "I'll help you." He told her, pressing a kiss to her forehead. Samar was grateful for it. The more help she had, the sooner it would get done. "Can we continue that after?" He asked, and she beamed.

"I think that can be arranged."


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coney Island.

"Samar, you're going to pace a hole in the floor if you keep that up." Liz said calmly from where she was sitting on the edge of Samar's bed.

"I can't help it." Samar responded. "I've never been on a date with someone I actually like before, I have no idea what to wear."

Liz smiled sympathetically at her friend and got up. "Well, that's okay. Because, luckily for you, I have." She walked to the dresser. "So, it's still kind of chilly. I'm thinking a sweater and a pair of a jeans? And one of your leather jackets?" Liz gently pulled a midnight blue sweater out of the drawer. "What about this?" She suggested, only continuing her search when Samar nodded. A pair of black jeans. "Red won't be able to resist you." Samar grinned at this, and Liz counted that as a victory. "I'll step outside so you can change." Samar nodded her thanks, and then Liz was walking out of the room, closing the door behind her.

Samar swallowed hard and slowly undressed, out of her pyjamas. She didn't change into the clothes Liz had picked out yet, instead choosing to look over her naked body. Figure-wise, she wasn't bad at all; she ate enough to keep herself at a decent weight, and she did enough exercise that her body was toned. But it wasn't any of that she was worried about. It was the map of scars on her body. Though she could only see the front of her body, her eyes instantly roamed over them in the mirror. Most were faded, but the point was, they were still there. And she knew they were there, which was just as bad. And her back had just as many, if not more.

What if they got further in their relationship, and Red didn't like what he saw? That was what Samar was scared of. Really, genuinely scared. Swallowing it all down, she put on a poker face and pulled on fresh underwear and a bra, followed by the sweater and jeans. Then she picked out a black leather jacket from the closet and put that on too, before heading out of the room to find Finn sitting at the top of the steps all ready to go.

"Look at you, all ready to go." Samar praised with a smile as she pulled her hair into a ponytail. "Where's Liz?"

Finn shrugged. "I haven't seen her." He responded. She moved to sit beside him.

"Are you okay, buddy?" Samar asked, wrapping her arm around him.

"I don't have to come if you don't want me to." His words surprised and horrified her.

"Of course I want you to come, Finn." Samar told him seriously. "And Red won't mind. He's the one who suggested Coney Island in the first place. Besides, if I want to get serious with Red, he needs to realize that you're a part of my life."

"Okay." Finn said finally, pressing a kiss to her cheek. Then he stood up. "Let's go."

Samar stood up as well, right as Liz called up to them. "Dembe's here. Red's in the back." Samar took Finn's hand and the two of them headed down the stairs to meet Red and Dembe.

 

Samar had never been to Coney Island, and as such she didn't have the slightest clue where to even begin, in all honesty. Finn stuck close to her side, clearly just as confused as she was. They had taken Red's jet, just for convenience. "Any ideas on where we should start?" Samar asked, her hand clasped in Red's.

Red turned around and knelt to Finn's level. "What would you like to do?" He asked gently, and Samar smiled softly.

Finn got a thoughtful look on his face. "Everything!" He said finally, causing Samar to laugh warmly.

Red chuckled. "Fair enough. Let me rephrase that: What would you like to do first?"

Finn blinked up at him. "What's your favourite thing to do here?" He asked innocently.

Red blinked, clearly caught off guard by the question. "I'll show you." Finn reached for his hand and took it, nodding. Samar's heart warmed as she watched Red and Finn walk over to one of the shooting games, where you shot water at the targets. Samar walked over, too, watching Red hand the man behind the counter a small wad of bills, and get ready to aim at the targets. Given who he was, Samar knew he would have an easy time with it.

As she had been expecting, he was incredible at it. Then again, she knew she would be, too, if she tried it. With how trained both of them were with guns, and weapons in general, that wasn't really surprising. He got a perfect score, and Samar clapped while Finn jumped up and down excitedly. The man behind the counter, who was really more of a boy now that Samar was getting a good look at him, gestured to the top row of prizes. The largest ones. "Pick anything you want."

Finn didn't hesitate, pointing at a large stuffed Dalmatian that looked as big as he was. "That one." He said eagerly, grinning at Samar.

"That one." Red echoed. Soon enough, the toy was being handed to Finn. It dwarfed him in size, and Red gently took it from him.

"Red, can you win me some more prizes?" Finn asked, and Samar could practically feel the happiness radiating off of him.

"Sure, although I think at the next game I'm going to win your mom something." He smiled at her as he said this. Samar found herself blushing yet again. Deeply. The three of them continued on their way. Finn was walking in between the two of them, holding one of Samar's hands and Red's free one.

A few minutes later, they came upon a strength game. Red turned to her. "Would you mind holding this for me, my dear?" He asked her.

"Not at all." She responded as she took the large stuffed Dalmatian from him. She watched him pick up the hammer and seem to brace himself before he brought it down. Samar watched, more than a little impressed as it got about eighty percent of the way up. He frowned, but it was still enough to get him a prize.

"I could've gotten it to the top ten years ago." He grumbled, clearly sulking, and Samar grinned softly as she kissed him gently on the lips.

"Trust me, you've still got it." She murmured.

Red seemed to relax more after this. He accepted the prize from the person running the strength test. Red turned to face her. "Samar, I want to give you my heart." He said overdramatically, causing her to laugh. Without a word, she kept walking, looking at everything. Red and Finn caught up to her because she wasn't actively trying to avoid them. She held the stuffed heart in her hands, close to her chest, almost absently.

"Can we go on the Ferris Wheel?" Finn asked suddenly.

"Sure." At the same time Red said this, Samar said "Of course we can." And she grinned shyly at him.

And sure enough, the three of them were soon on the Ferris Wheel, going up. Because of its size, they left the stuffed Dalmatian with the person running the wheel. But Samar kept the small heart with her. She held Red's hand with her free one. Finn was on his other side, and somehow Samar knew he was holding Red's other hand. "Have you enjoyed yourself, Samar?" He murmured in her ear.

Samar nodded and looked at him. "I honestly can't remember the last time I was this happy." She told him honestly, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"I'm so happy to hear that." Red whispered, pressing a kiss to her forehead. Then he wrapped his arm around her waist and carefully pulled her closer, where she nestled her head against his shoulder and partially his chest as well. "You deserve it, you know. To be happy." There was a pause. "By the way, did I tell you that you look incredible?"

"Thank you. Liz helped me pick it out." Samar wouldn't take credit where she'd really had no part in, save for the jacket and her boots, of course.

"Well, you look absolutely breathtaking." Samar could feel Red playing with her hair again, and she smiled.

"I can see the city!" Finn enthused, pointing. Samar's gaze followed his finger, where you could in fact see the city. Barely, but you could still see it.

"Look at that." Red murmured. Samar could hear the smile in his voice. "So you can." They sat in a comfortable silence for a while, until the ride ended. Then they got off, picked up the dog and spent a couple more hours walking around.

 

The plane ride back was quiet. Raymond Reddington was used to having only Dembe and his flight attendant on his private plane. But not this time. This time he had two very important people with him. Samar was currently sound asleep with her feet tucked under her body, her head on his shoulder. And Finn, the little boy she'd adopted as her own, was curled against his side, also sound asleep.

So much time had passed since Red had been able to have this, the warmth of family, that he'd forgotten how much he missed it. But now that he had it again, he wasn't about to let anything happen to either of them. Logically, given who he was, he knew getting attached to them would just make them an easier target for his enemies, and the best thing to do would just be to walk away before they had the chance to get hurt because of him.

He also knew, however, that he'd never forgive himself if he did.

Red leaned his head back against the seat and closed his eyes, a soft smile on his face at the thought of doing more things like this with the two of them.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn meets his tutor, Navabington has another moment.

"Samar, I'm nervous." Finn said softly as she stood with him while he put off going down to meet his tutor.

"Why?" Samar asked, kneeling to his level.

"What if the tutor doesn't like me?" Samar's heart broke at Finn's words, and the expression on his face. "What if I do something wrong, or say something wrong?"

Samar shook her head, gently taking his little hands. "Finn, you're the sweetest kid I know. If the tutor doesn't like you, then they have the problem, not you. And it's okay if you make mistakes, do you know why?" He shook his head. "Because the tutor is there to help you learn." The sound of a doorbell rang out, and Finn clutched Samar's hands. "Tell you what, if you want, I can stay with you this first session so you can see how you like it."

"I'd like that." Finn told her, giving her a hug that she quickly reciprocated. The two of them walked down the stairs, where Samar opened the door to reveal Red and a man she didn't recognize. This must be the tutor, she realized.

She smiled at Red, who responded by kissing her on the cheek, and beaming at Finn. "This is Roger, he's the best tutor I could find." Red introduced. Roger smiled and waved. He seemed nice enough, but Samar just hoped he was a good tutor.

"I've set a little area up in the living room for you two." She gave Finn a hug and let him go off with Roger. Then she turned to Red. "Do you want to come in for a bit? I was about to make some coffee." She offered almost shyly, smiling as she thought about their date last night, and the stuffed heart that currently rested on her bed.

"Coffee sounds lovely. Shall we?" He gestured for her to go first, and she moved into the kitchen. It still felt surreal to have all of these new devices, because before she had never felt a need for any of them. A dishwasher, a coffee pot. She started to set up the coffee pot as he made himself comfortable. He had been around often enough that he had the privilege to do so, without needing to ask if he could or not. "Roger's a good man, Samar. You have nothing to worry about." He said, as if reading her mind. She nodded, giving him a gentle smile as she pressed a button to start the coffee maker, smiling wider as she listened to Roger and Finn talking in the other room. "Did I tell you that you look nice today?"

Considering she was wearing a black t-shirt and a pair of sweats under a silk housecoat, she was surprised to hear this. "Now I know you're just saying that." She said softly. In spite of her words, however, she blushed.

Samar couldn't help the gasp of surprise that escaped her lips as she felt a pair of strong arms wrapping around her middle and pulling her back into a warm embrace. "My dear, when have you ever known me to say something I don't mean?" She heard his voice at her ear, felt his warm breath on her earlobe. Then she felt him press his lips to her jaw. Knowing she had to be mindful of the sounds she was making because Finn was just in the other room, her eyes fluttered closed and she exhaled softly. She felt him smirk against her jaw, as he lazily moved down to her neck. "You like that?" Samar nodded, knowing he would likely be able to feel it since his lips were resting against her neck. "I know you and I don't share the same beliefs on your body, Samar." He murmured, moving his lips away from her neck just enough so that she could clearly hear his words. "But I think you'd be beautiful in anything you chose to wear."

She could hear in his voice that he meant every word he was saying, and Samar's cheeks grew warmer. Samar turned in his arms and lightly draped her arms around his neck. "I don't deserve this." She whispered, resting her forehead against his shoulder.

Red's brows furrowed in confusion. "Don't deserve what?" He murmured. He stroked his fingers down her neck, causing her to shiver in his embrace.

"Any of this. You, Finn, everything you've done for me." Samar wasn't looking at him. She didn't feel like she could.

"And why not?" Samar felt Red's hand on her chin, gently bringing it up so they were looking at each other. "Samar, no one expects you to be perfect. Not Finn, not the team, certainly not me." He cupped her cheeks. "You're only human. You may have done things you're not proud of-haven't we all? But that doesn't change who you are now, or the things you've done because it was the right thing to do. Finn would be  **dead**  without you. Not to mention you've helped me and the task force on numerous occasions." She blinked away tears that welled up in her eyes as he continued speaking. "So, I have to disagree with you. I think you deserve  _everything_  you have right now. A little boy who looks at you like you're his saviour, a team who would bend over backwards to help you. And," Was he blushing? "a man who adores you."

She knew she was blushing again. But she couldn't help it, he knew just what to say to make her blush. "You adore me?" Samar murmured.

"I thought that was obvious?" Red asked quietly, drawing her back into his embrace. "But yes. I adore you. And when the time's right, I plan to show you just how much I adore you." The bluntness to his words sent a shiver down her spine. "But for the moment, I don't feel like either of us is ready to take that big of a leap."

And in that moment, Samar knew what he was referring to. Sex.

"I think you're right about that." She agreed softly. Not only was this possibly the most inconvenient time and place for anything like that, but she knew she was nowhere near ready for something so intimate. She'd never even been on a date with someone she genuinely liked, let alone shared a bed-as well as the most intimate parts of herself-with someone, that wasn't part of a mission. She was beyond grateful that he wasn't rushing into things. Then again, that wasn't Red. He was a gentleman through and through. "I look forward to the time being right." She said finally, giving him a gentle kiss on the lips.

Red smiled against her mouth and responded to the kiss eagerly. "Neither can I. But there's no rush." If the way he was holding her was any indication, he had absolutely no desire to rush into things. Good. Because neither did she. She could've kept kissing him forever, and she probably would've...

If the coffee pot hadn't started beeping obnoxiously, letting her know that the coffee was ready. Sighing softly, she broke the kiss and moved over to grab a couple of mugs for them. She pulled out a couple of mugs and turned to find Red holding the pot by the handle. "I figured things would go a lot more smoothly if you didn't have to do everything." He said simply. Samar was unable to stop herself from smiling as she placed the mugs down on the counter, and Red moved over to pour the dark liquid into the mugs.

"How do you take your coffee?" Samar asked upon realizing that she knew nothing simple about him. How he took his coffee, what movies he liked. If they were going to be in a relationship, and by this point she assumed they were, she needed to change that.

"I take it with just a little bit of milk." Red told her, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "And you?"

"Black." Samar told him in response. "Like my soul." She was teasing, of course. Her soul wasn't clean by any stretch of the imagination, but it certainly wasn't black. Still, when he chuckled, she felt triumphant. She watched him pour a bit of milk into a teaspoon she hadn't seen him get out, and then pour that into his coffee.

Then she moved to put the milk away, but he held up his hand briefly in a 'Stop' gesture. "I've got it. You just enjoy your soulless coffee." Red told her with a wink, and she rolled her eyes as she picked up the mug and blew lightly on the coffee. If only so it didn't burn her tongue. She leaned back against the counter and sipped at her coffee, and soon Red joined her. It didn't take her long to rest her head on his shoulder. The two of them drank their coffee in silence, enjoying the close proximity. She could've stayed that way forever. But eventually, they both finished their coffee and he pressed a kiss to her temple before moving away from the counter. "I should go, I have business to attend to." He turned to face her, gently stroking her cheek. "See you later?"

Samar nodded. "I think you will." She washed the mugs out and then dried them off before putting them away. Then she followed Red out to the door, peeking into the room where Finn and his tutor sat. She watched Red leave, giving him a wave, and then slipped silently into the room where Roger was teaching Finn to read. She leaned against the wall, not drawing attention to herself. But if Finn looked, he would see her. Things seemed to be going well, and she smiled. It was exactly as she had expected things to go. Finn looked up from what he was reading, and looked around the room. When he saw her, he smiled so big that she couldn't help smiling back.

As she watched, Finn looked at Roger with an innocent look in his eyes. "Can my mom come sit with us?" He asked, and for a moment she was confused. Then she registered what he had said, and she felt a wave of flattered shock go through her.  _He'd just called her his mom._

"Well, if you stay focused, I don't see why not." Roger said.

Finn nodded, then he got up off the couch on which they were sitting and walking over to her. "Would you come sit with me?" He asked.

"Of course, sweetheart." Samar let him take her hand and bring her back over to the couch, where she sat down beside him. He picked up the book and went straight back to reading. Samar stayed close by, listening to him read aloud. He was doing very well, though it understandably took him a while.

 

Eventually, it was time for the lesson to end. Samar and Finn walked Roger to the door together. "Same time tomorrow?" He asked as he knelt to Finn's level.

Finn nodded. "See you tomorrow!" He said jovially.

Roger nodded at Samar, who gave a nod right back. Then he left out the door, and Samar smiled at Finn. "I'm proud of you." She told him, bending to press a kiss to the top of his head. "Do you want to watch a movie?" She asked him, laughing softly when he nodded. "Okay, come on." The two of them headed to the couch, and Samar couldn't help feeling like the hardest part was behind them now.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Samar goes back to work, but there are complications no one could've seen coming.

When Samar opened her eyes that morning, she realized that the week she'd taken off work had come to an end. Getting up out of bed, she reached for her phone and texted Cooper that she'd be in to work as soon as she made sure Finn was taken care of all day. In case work ran late, as it so often did. The response from Cooper was immediate, telling her that was more than okay. She placed her phone back on the bed side table and moved over to get dressed. Once that was done, she grabbed her phone and stuck it in her pocket before heading out of her room to Finn's. The door was open a crack, and as a result she peeked in and saw Finn sitting on the floor playing with a toy rocket ship she'd found out from Kate that Red had bought him shortly before they'd moved in.

She knocked gently on the door. Finn looked up and beamed when he saw her.

"Hey, buddy, I have to go back to work today." She told him, coming into the room and sitting down with him. "I'm not sure when I'll be back."

"That's okay." Finn said, his tone soft as per usual. But there was also a kindness that surpassed the level a kid Finn's age should know. It blew her away. "Roger will be here with me."

"I might be late." Samar told him. She knew full well that Roger couldn't stay with him all day.

"What about Aunt Kate?" Finn asked, and Samar was stumped as to he was referring to, until she wasn't. Mr. Kaplan. He'd called her his aunt. Then again, given the connection he'd made with not only Kate, but Red as well, that wasn't surprising.

Though Samar didn't know her well, she had a feeling Kate would appreciate being called that. And she had no doubts that Kate wouldn't mind babysitting if work did run late. "I'll give her a call right now." She kissed him on the forehead and got up. "Want me to put some toast in the toaster?"

Finn nodded. "Yes, please." Samar couldn't help thinking that maybe she was getting the hang of this 'mother' thing.

She headed down the stairs to get everything done that needed to be done.

 

By the time she headed out the door, Finn had eaten his toast, Samar had eaten as well, and Roger was at the house. Not only that, but Kate was coming to look after Finn as soon as Roger left-Samar could only assume that Red had told her Roger's hours of operation. And if she got back before Roger left, she'd call Kate and tell her not to worry.

But even if that ended up being the case, it was nice to know Finn would be looked after. It was nice to walk into work and not feel rushed, and she was glad that she had told Cooper that she'd be late, and why.

Aram beamed at her as she entered the Post Office and she got settled at her desk as she listened to Red brief the team on a new threat. When he turned around, his eyes fell on her, and he smiled. Shyly, hoping no one noticed, she smiled back.

"He was last seen by my men at this address." Red told them, pointing to a strip of paper on the board with large writing on it. "Catch him, and he should lead you to the man you want."

"Ressler, Keen, Navabi." Cooper spoke. "You know what to do." Nodding, Samar got up, grabbing her weapon and badge and anything else she might need to catch a criminal. Ressler and Keen were already heading towards the elevator.

Samar started to do the same. But Red's voice stopped her. "Agent Navabi, my dear." She turned to look at him, and the look on his face both scared her, and made her want to melt. "Be careful."

"I always am." She told him, wishing she could give him a kiss. But they weren't out as being in a relationship to the team yet. And rightfully so, considering they had only been dating, if that was what they were doing, for a week and a bit. "Try not to be too bored without us here to entertain you." She said with a genuine smile in his direction. Then she followed Liz and Ressler.

 

It was way too quiet as they entered the house. The atmosphere instantly set Samar on edge and, as a result, her hand went to her gun. "We should split up." Liz said, and Samar could think of several reasons why was that was not a good idea. But before she could offer up her concerns, Liz spoke again. "I've got this level covered." Then again, they'd get more done this way. "If you find White, take him down." If Liz were anyone else but a member of the task force, Samar wouldn't take very kindly to what sounded like orders coming from her mouth. "Ressler, could you take the upstairs?" She asked, and Samar watched him nod.

That left Samar with the basement. "Liz, I know we'll get the place canvassed more quickly if we split up." She started. "But I pride myself on my instincts, and this is not a good idea."

"We'll all be within hearing distance of each other." Ressler assured, but as Samar was looking at him, she saw his eyes flicker to the door of the basement, and the darkness of it.

"And if anything goes wrong, not that I think anything will, just call out." Liz agreed with a nod, and then both herself and Ressler wandered off to canvas their respective areas. Samar turned to the basement. They were right, of course; this was just a soft lead. There was probably no one here. That thought in her head, she flicked on the light and headed down the stairs. Everything had been cleaned out. If someone had been here, they weren't now.

Because it was so quiet, it didn't take her long to hear footsteps behind her. Whirling, she punched out with her fist and watched a man she didn't recognize stumble backwards.

"They said you'd be feisty." He spoke, but in Farsi. "Luckily for you, I like feisty." And then he lunged at her. She dodged quickly and lunged at him.

"Who are you?" She spoke as the two of them fought, also in Farsi.

"That's none of your concern."

Samar was convinced she could take him. But when she felt two large hands pulling her wrists behind her back and zip tying them there, all of that went out the window. "Two against one? You're a couple of real heroes, aren't you?" Her tone dripped with sarcasm. Samar kicked out with her feet, trying to ignore the fear that was steadily growing in the pit of her stomach.

Her first assailant caught her legs, and soon they were zip tied as well. "We didn't come here to fight with you, Miss Navabi. We came here to take you, and that's it. Stop fighting; you're only making this harder on yourself."

"Take me where?" She retorted. It occurred to her that she should call out. But before she could, a cloth was placed over her mouth and nose and held there. She tried to struggle, but that was hard to do when all of her limbs had been rendered immobile. She struck out with her bound feet and hoped it hit somewhere painful. Judging from the groan the man in front of her emitted, she assumed it had. The cloth fell away from her mouth as the kick caused him to stumble backwards to the floor. There was a loud crash as he made contact with the floor.

"Samar?" She felt a spark of hope as she heard Liz's voice from the middle level. "Is everything okay down there?"

She opened her mouth to call out, but a large hand pressed itself to her throat, a mouth pressed to her ear. "Call out, and I'll make sure it's the last thing you ever do." The voice came from behind her, and she knew it was the man who had her hands in a vice grip with his free one.

"If you don't want her to come down here and find you, let me tell her everything's fine." Samar got out, mildly scared he'd make good on his threat.

"Not a chance." The first man spoke, lifting a panel she hadn't seen. A trap door, leading outside. Vaguely, she heard footsteps coming down the stairs, but she knew that whoever it was wouldn't get there in time. "Take her and let's go." She was practically carried down the stairs towards a van. Samar hadn't given up struggling. She knew it was hopeless at this point, but that didn't mean she'd stop. She had Finn to get back to, she couldn't let them take her. But how could she stop them? There were two of them and one of her, and she was at a huge disadvantage. Unceremoniously, she was tossed into the van, and the impact knocked the wind out of her. Then the doors were closed, leaving her in darkness, and she was left hoping that either her captors were stupid enough that escape would be easy, or that Red found out where she was and came to get her. So he could bring her back to Finn.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The race to find Samar begins.

Elizabeth Keen came out of the house through the trap door's path to watch a van drive off. Given the fact that Samar was nowhere in sight, Liz could only assume the worst. "Ressler!" She cried as she moved back into the house at a run. Ressler was already racing down the stairs to meet her on the main floor.

"Where's Navabi?" He asked but at the same time, he didn't look like he wanted to hear the answer.

"She's gone." Liz was aware of her hands shaking and clenched them into fists at her sides to stop it. "I was wrong about there not being anyone here. Ressler, if I hadn't made her go down there...This is all my fault."

Ressler reached out and placed his hands gently on her shoulders. "What's done is done, Liz. You can't have known." He said, his tone soft. "Now we need to focus on getting her back. I'll call Cooper."

Instantly, Liz was turning away from Ressler and pulling out her phone to call Red. He deserved to know, although she could only begin to imagine how he would react when he found out.

 

Raymond Reddington was almost over the moon as he left a meeting with Dembe by his side. As he'd been expecting, the meeting had gone well, and he'd gotten the information he needed. The folder in question was tucked under his arm, and the sun was shining brightly.

His phone rang, and he answered it once he saw the number. "Lizzie!" He said cheerily. "How's the case going?"

There was a long pause on the other end of the line. "That's actually why I'm calling." Red's smile dropped off his face. Her sombre tone genuinely scared him, and that wasn't an easy feat to accomplish. "The location you gave us...We went in thinking it was empty. It wasn't, and..."

His bad feeling only intensified. "Lizzie."

"Samar’s gone. By the time I realized something was wrong, it was too late, the van had already left." Liz spoke, sounding shaken, and Red's grip tightened on the phone as his throat went dry. "I'm so sorry, Red." Her voice was a whisper now.

"Did you get a good look at the van? The kidnappers?" He was fighting to stay calm. Part of him wanted to hunt the bastard, or bastards, who took her down and kill them, but part of him wanted to break down. He didn't listen to either of those parts. Instead, he pushed his feelings aside for the time being. His main priority was getting her back safely.

"No, I didn't see the kidnappers. And the van just looked like a plain white one." Liz responded.

"Did you get the license plate?" Red's grip was still tight on the phone.

"No, I didn't." Liz murmured, and Red felt the burner phone crack ever so slightly in his tight grip.

"Meet me back at the Post Office as soon as possible." Red told her. "We'll figure this out." Then he hung up and turned to Dembe. "To the Post Office, Dembe. Our plans have changed." And they now hinged on Samar's safety.

 

When Samar opened her eyes, she was on a cold concrete floor. Her hands and feet were still zip tied, and scared would be putting how she felt mildly. It took some shifting, but she managed to get herself onto her knees despite her limited range of movement. It almost looked like the warehouse Red had been kept in when she first met him. It wasn't, of course, because she would know if she was there. Instantly, she started looking around for a camera, and sure enough, there was one in the corner of the room. She could see its singular eye and the blinking red light. Samar glanced around the room, looking for anything that could help her. But there was nothing. No windows, one door that she assumed was locked. The floor was completely bare as well. She watched the door, waiting to see if someone would come in.

But no one did.

She was alone.

Once she became certain that no one was going to come in, she sank back to the floor, trying hard to hold onto her composure. Especially now that she knew there was a camera in the room, and that her captors were likely watching her. They wanted her to break.

She wouldn't give them that satisfaction.

 

It had been almost five hours and the team still hadn't figured out who might've taken Samar. Both Red and Liz were wondering if her captor was someone Red had wronged in the past, and they'd taken her as payback. But despite how many enemies Red undoubtedly had, he couldn't think of anyone who would go after Samar to get to him.

But maybe he didn't need to be going through _his_ list of enemies.

Maybe he needed to be going through **Samar's** _._

Red was almost certain they hadn't been going out long enough-or publicly enough for that matter-for any of his enemies to know who she was, or what she meant, to him. But he knew enough about Samar by this point to know that she also had her fair share of enemies.

At this present time, only one came to mind. But saying as much would out that Samar had killed him. Red turned to face the task force. "I know who may be behind this." He said, and almost immediately he had their full attention. "However, you have to give me your word that you will not prosecute Samar for what I'm about to tell you."

"You have it." Harold didn't hesitate, and Red knew there was a reason he liked him.

"The reason the Scimitar is dead is because Samar killed him." Red's tone was matter-of-fact, professional. "The reasons as to why she did such a thing are not mine to share. I think if anyone were to want revenge on her, it would be a relative of his. So I'm proposing that you find out everything you can about him. But not about him as a criminal, I already know nearly everything about that. But rather, find out who he is as a person. Interests, upbringing, familial ties." It wasn't much, but it was more than they'd had five hours ago. "Specifically, find out if he has any family who would be willing to kidnap as revenge for his death."

"I'm on it." Aram said, and with those three words, the task force sprang into action. Red, however, had a different plan as he exited the black site. He was going to pay Mr. Hassan a visit.

 

Samar had no sense of time. All she knew was that it had been at least a few hours since she had been abducted. Her arms were aching from being bound behind her back for so long. Why hadn't her captors come in to gloat yet?

 _Well, maybe they're not the masterminds._ Her conscience spoke up. _Maybe they just do the dirty work._ If that was the case, and she supposed it did make sense, considering what the first man had said to her earlier, that begged the question: Who _was_ the mastermind in all of this? Her tongue wet her lips, which were very dry. Usually she kept her body hydrated, but here, she couldn't exactly do that, and as a result, she was starting to feel the effects. It wasn't unbearable yet, she knew that wouldn't be the case for another day or so at least. But the culmination of everything-the uncertainty of where she was or what was to happen, the thirst, the uncomfortable position, was really taking a toll on her body and her mind. Despite her training in interrogation, she hadn't been on the receiving end in a while. Not since her Mossad training days. She could almost admire the way they were leaving her alone with her thoughts.

Almost. If she wasn't scared out of her mind.

 _Now I know how the people I did this to felt._ She thought dully. Samar was homesick and scared and she just wanted out. She was helpless, though, and all she could do was wait.

 

Red was in no mood to be pleasant as he all but stormed up to Ali's front door. He knocked firmly. "Ali, open up. We have business to discuss, and it absolutely can't wait." He said forcefully. His mind was filled with all the awful things Samar could be enduring right now. "Ali, if you don't open this door in three seconds, I will kick it in." He was aware of Dembe at his side, could almost feel his disapproving glare, but he didn't care at the moment.

The man had a significant amount of clothes on this time around when he answered the door. "Reddington. You look well." He said, but he seemed to get progressively more nervous as he searched Red's face.

"I'm not here for pleasantries, Hassan." He said, watching Ali flinch at the cold tone of his voice. "I need you to tell me if you've had any contact with the Scimitar's associates or friends. And if you ask me why, I'll make you wish you hadn't. I'm feeling less than charitable right now."

"Yes, just one of them. His younger brother, Gadi." Ali said, clearly scared for his life.

"What did he want?" Red produced a pistol from his coat and pointed it at him.

"He wanted to know if I could give him a warehouse to use, but he didn't say why."

"Did he say for how long he needed it?" This was tedious. Red didn't want to stand around waiting for answers. Ali shook his head. "If you're lying to me..." He all but growled.

"I'm not, I swear!" Ali's tone was pleading now.

"Good. Now I need the address." Red told him, and it took Ali all of five seconds to tell him the address, which Red inputted into his phone.

Instantly, his mood changed. "Thank you for cooperating. Have a good rest of your day." Then he turned around and headed back to his car.

 

Finn sat snuggled against Kate's side, watching a movie. "Aunt Kate?" He asked quietly. She glanced down at him, feeling almost nervous, which was a first for her. "Did something happen to my mom?"

She was startled that he called her 'Aunt Kate'. But she had to admit that she liked it. She'd never had any kids of her own. "Yes, dearie." She murmured, wishing more than anything that she didn't have to say those words.

"Red and the team will get her back, though, right?" He asked, his tone innocent.

Kate didn't have a solid answer for him, and that absolutely broke her heart. "Raymond won't rest until he knows she's safe." That was the best she could do at this present moment. Finn snuggled closer, and she let him. All she could do was hope Samar was all right.

 

Samar looked up as the door opened, sending light into the room. Samar squeezed her eyes shut, biting back her sound of discomfort. She wouldn't give them the satisfaction of seeing that. She was grabbed by her bound arms and hauled to her bound feet. The lack of food and water in her system caused her to sway a little on her feet. Both of her captors laughed. The one holding her arms shoved her forward, causing her to stumble slightly. There was a fourth person in the room, now; she could tell because they caught her by the shoulders and set her upright. She gasped softly as she looked into the eyes of a man who looked almost identical to Walid Abu Sitta, if not a little younger. And a lot meaner looking. "So _you're_ Samar Navabi." He said as his eyes roamed down her body, causing her to shudder. "I must say, you're a lot more attractive than I imagined you." He turned his attention from her to his lackeys. "Get her out to the van. Our location has been compromised, we need to leave now."

Their location had been compromised? Did that mean someone knew she was here? Or, at the very least, knew something was going on here?

"Where?" The man holding her arms once more spoke.

"I have another safe house, but we need to move **now**." The Scimitar's lookalike urged. "Come on." He started outside, and she was dragged after them. She tried to struggle, but she was so exhausted, and she couldn't get decent purchase on the ground with her feet.

"You're not going to get away with this." Her voice was shaky. Despite her words, she wasn't convinced. But at the same time, she had faith that Red would find her.

"Who's going to tell on me? You?" He addressed her like they were old friends. "Don't worry, Samar: Once we get to our new destination, you won't live much longer. So, yes, I think I will get away with this."

And up ahead she could see the van once more. Had it been washed?

 _Am I seriously wondering if they washed the van they used to take me captive?_ Maybe she really had lost it. Once again, she was tossed unceremoniously into the van. _This whole scenario feels like a déjà vu._

"We'll make sure your body's nice and pretty when we send it back to Reddington." Walid Abu Sitta Jr., which was what she was calling him until she learned his name, said before he shut the doors of the van.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two of Samar's capture, and the rescue.

Samar's head was fuzzy as she blinked awake. Not to mention it hurt. Something was definitely not right with her body.

"What the hell did you do to me?" She got out. Her throat was dry, her tongue felt like sandpaper. She was on a mattress this time, but it was ratty. If she wasn't so exhausted, if her limbs didn't feel so heavy, she'd try to get away from it.

She knew what they had done to her before they told her. "We just gave you something to make you more relaxed."

_They drugged me._

"You're sick." Samar tried to regain control of her faculties. Whatever they'd given her, however, was damn effective, because each limb felt like there was a heavy weight attached.

"That I am." The lackey agreed and then, to her horror, he joined her on the mattress.

No. No, no, this wasn't happening. She scrambled away as quickly as she could, with her hands still bound behind her back. But...her feet were no longer bound. If she could summon enough strength to fight back, she might be able to get away.

It took a lot of her strength, but she managed to kick him in the stomach when he got close enough. Rolling, she tried to struggle to her feet, but she felt so weighed down and so tired that she just couldn't. "No, no please." She whispered helplessly. Then she felt his weight on top of her, pinning her to the ratty mattress. Samar turned her head away from him, so she was looking at the door instead of at her assailant. Squeezing her eyes shut, she forced herself to think about literally anything else.

Samar pictured Red's face, pictured his soft smile-the way his eyes crinkled just so when a smile was particularly genuine. She clung to how much he cared about her, and how he was likely still looking for her, dimly aware of her assailant's hands sliding under her shirt, cold on her stomach...

 

Red burst into the warehouse, Liz on his heels, only to find it empty. He could barely breathe. "She was supposed to be here..." He got out. She made him so vulnerable, and that terrified him. But he needed her in his life. Red gripped the wall for support.

Liz had never seen him like this, in all the time she'd known him. "Red, we're going to find her. We're going to get the men who did this."

"You're right." Red's tone became very determined. "And when we do find them, I'll make them wish they had never laid a hand on her." He got up. "They had to have been tipped off by someone." His first thought was that Ali had told Gadi that he was coming. He was about to say something else, but he saw a smashed rectangle a few feet away from where he currently stood.

It looked like a phone.

Cautiously, and with a terrible feeling sitting in the pit of his stomach, he approached the object.

"What is it?" Liz asked, tone wary.

"Samar's phone." Red tried to stay calm. Liz was the only member of the task force, aside from Samar herself, he called her Samar around. He felt a hand on his shoulder and jolted a little. Glancing up, he saw that it was Liz. He took comfort in the gesture. Samar had to be okay. Finn needed her. But not only him. Red needed her, too. "Lizzie." He murmured. "If something happens to her, I don't know what I'll do." His tone was weak.

"We'll find her." Liz told him, and she hoped with all her heart that it was true.

 

Samar was curled up on the ratty mattress, feeling dirty. She wanted nothing more than to have a boiling hot shower and scrub what she had just endured off of her. But that wasn't possible. It had been at least a day since she'd had any food or water, and she was really feeling it. The door opened, and she didn't give it so much as a glance.

"Thirsty?" She heard the voice of the man who had assaulted her. She didn't answer him. "Come on, dollface, you can't ignore me forever."

 _Watch me._ She thought.

She heard the snick of a blade, and suddenly her hands were free. "I figured you'd have an easier time drinking if your hands weren't bound." He said and, cautiously, she turned to face him. He held a glass of water in his hand. "Here."

There was a high chance it could be drugged. Samar knew that. But she was  _desperate_  for water. So she took the glass from him and took a sip. It took all of her self control not to drink it all in one sitting. She wanted to look away from him, but she didn't want him to think he'd won, so she kept her eyes on his. Samar didn't thank him for it, figuring he wanted something from her, and that was why he'd brought her the glass. As she drank, he sat there, watching her, but she did her best to ignore him. Samar couldn't have had more than a few sips before he was taking the cup and pouring what was left in it on her. Gasping in shock, she moved quickly away from him, until her back hit the wall of the building she was in. He was smirking cruelly, and she squeezed her eyes shut so she didn't have to see it. "You look better like this, dollface." He said, but she didn't open her eyes. Samar heard him get up, heard the door open and close behind him as he left the room.

It was getting harder and harder to keep her self control. She'd been through so much since they'd switched locations, but even before that. She was free now, but the weakness she felt made it very clear that she wouldn't be able to do anything.

Chilled to the bone and scared, she lay back down on the mattress and squeezed her eyes shut, hoping someone found her before she broke.

 

The air in the vehicle was tense. Red was well known for his immense amount of self control, but he could feel it all cracking and crumbling away to nothing. Liz was on the phone with Aram. So instead of watching her, he turned and looked out the window instead.

He glanced over as Liz tapped him on the shoulder. "Aram emailed me a vocal file of a message sent to Gadi's phone, the tipoff that caused him to switch locations."

"Play it." He said, and Liz nodded, pressing a button.

 _"I have reason to believe that someone knows of your location and is on the way there now."_ The voice was synthesized, deepened.  _"If you hurry, you should be able to get your cargo out of there before they show up."_

"I know that voice." Red spoke up. "He's an acquaintance of Ali. His name is Kir Velsi. He's an incredibly skilled hacker and programmer, mainly for computers. But his skills can also extend to other forms of technology."

The message continued.  _"If you want to, you can bring her to my family's old storage house. Nobody's used that place in years."_

Red nodded. "Dembe, take Lizzie home." At her quizzical expression, he continued speaking. "I have something I need to do, Lizzie, and I don't want you to be present for it."

"Red, it was indirectly my fault Samar got taken. Please let me come with you." Liz's tone was pleading. Red didn't want her to see that side of him, but at the same time, he couldn't blame her for wanting to come along.

"All right, Lizzie." He caught Dembe's eyes in the mirror. "Take us to Kir's house, please." He said, and Dembe nodded.

 

Red didn't wait for Velsi to answer the door. He'd wasted too much time on pleasantries with Hassan. Instead he just kicked the door in and stormed into the house, without waiting for Liz or Dembe to follow him. "Velsi!" He snapped, pulling the pistol out from his jacket. He stopped moving for a bit so he could listen. Shortly after this, he heard movement upstairs. In an instant, he was moving up the stairs, pointing the gun straight ahead of him. It didn't take him long to find Kir, hunched at a desk on a computer. He made sure the pistol was loaded, cocked it, and pointed it at him. The man startled like a rabbit, glancing up with wide eyes. "Tell me the location of the storage house." He would barely recognize his own voice if he was in the right mindset. "If I were you, I wouldn't test me."

"It's about twenty minutes from here, north on route seven. The building is large and made of stone. You can't miss it." The man responded.

"Thank you for being so helpful." Red spoke, and then a gunshot rang out. He blew smoke off the barrel, put it away, and tossed Liz his phone. "Call Kate and get her to come clean this up, please." He said, and then headed out of the room. He'd wait for her in the car.

 

Samar curled in on herself as she heard the door open again. Hadn't she suffered enough for one day? She glanced up. The man who had hurt her-whom she had taken to referring to as Ugly-stood there, smirking at her. Her hair was dry, but she swore she could still feel the chill of the water. He looked like he wanted to say something, but gunfire outside the door stopped him. Her heart leaped into her throat. Suddenly, the door burst open and she saw Liz. Gunshots echoed around the room, and she watched with satisfaction as Ugly fell to the ground, bullet holes in his chest.  _Please be dead._ She thought desperately.

Liz's eyes fell on her, and she could only imagine how terrible she must look. Samar's gaze fell to the floor. "Red, I found her! She's in here!" Liz called out, and Samar's head snapped back up hearing Red's name. Samar turned her gaze to the door and could've started crying at the sight of Red in the doorway.

The next second he was rushing forward and wrapping her in his arms. All of her self control shattered and she clutched onto him, burying her face in his shoulder and crying. Red held her protectively in his arms, and then he scooped her up and stood. The sooner they got out of here, the better off she'd be. Immediately, had Dembe drive them to a specialist he knew. A regular hospital wasn't safe for someone like him, but he had to make sure she was okay.

 

Samar sat on the table, while Red sat beside her in a chair. He refused to leave her side. She had her arms wrapped around herself in a hug, wishing she didn't have to say anything. Mark Maracino was both a doctor and a psychologist. They were currently waiting on him to come in.

"Samar, say something." He murmured, and she swore she detected a hint of hysteria in his voice.

"I don't know what to say." She whispered, and the defeated tone broke his heart.

"That's a start." He offered, and she smiled weakly. "You don't ever have to talk about what you endured, if you don't want to. But I want you to know I'm here for you."

"I do know that." Samar murmured. She didn't say anything for a little while. "Would you hold my hand, please?"

"Of course." Red told her, and reached out to take her hand. Once his hand was in hers, she held on tight. The door opened, and she flinched, her grip on his hand tightening slightly. If Red had the power, he would revive all of the bastards who had hurt her this badly and torture them to death. "Mark." He said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. He was too concerned for Samar to smile and mean it.

Luckily, Mark seemed to understand that. "Red." He gave a cordial nod. "And I'm guessing you're Samar?" He addressed her, and she nodded. "Well, it's nice to meet you."

"I wish we'd met under better circumstances." She offered, and Red rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. Progress was being made.

Mark gave her a sad smile. "I do, too." He leaned back against the table. "So, here's what going to happen. I need you to tell me if anything hurts right now. Normally I'd do the examination myself, but I get the feeling you don't really want to be touched. Am I right?"

Red watched Samar swallow hard, and alarm flared up in him. "That's right." She whispered.

Mark glanced at Red, and then let his gaze go back to Samar. "So, does anything hurt?"

Samar shifted on the table. "My arms and wrists." She told him honestly. "They were bound behind my back for a long time."

"Can you show me them?" Mark asked.

Samar was immensely relieved that he didn't force her to do anything. Then again, if he was on Red's team, she wasn't surprised. Nodding, she pushed up her sleeves-having taken her jacket off upon entering the room, and took in the sight of the angry red circles from the zip tie imprinted on her skin. She kept her eyes on her wrists, not daring to look at Red or Doctor Maracino.

"And is there anywhere else on your body that suffered trauma?" Mark asked, and she flinched, trying not to let her mind pull her back there.

Samar squeezed her eyes shut and breathed in deeply, and then out just as much so. "My captors, when we were moving locations...they drugged me. When I woke up, I was in the new location, and I knew something was wrong. My limbs felt heavy, I could barely move. And one of my captors was in the room with me." She felt a hand slide into hers and knew Red was holding it. "He lowered himself down onto the mattress I was laying on and I kicked him in an attempt to get away. But I was too weak to get away. He pinned me and..." Samar shook her head. "I don't think I can say any more." She whispered, and her voice was shaky. She was aware that Red's grip had tightened slightly on her hand.

"That's okay, Samar." Mark told her gently. "How long ago did this happen?"

"I don't know, I had no way to keep time." Samar shook her head again, wanting nothing more than to curl up in a ball or disappear. "Can I go home now?" She was shaky all over. Samar missed Finn deeply, and she wanted nothing more than to hold him in her arms.

Mark looked like he wanted to advise against it. But she watched him glance at Red, and whatever he saw there, she couldn't look at him, made him decide not to. "Of course you can. Here's my card, call me if you need anything." He handed her a small, laminated card.

"Thank you." Samar whispered, and let Red steady her as she got down off the table. The pair of them headed towards the door of the examination room. On the way out, Dr. Maracino handed her a bottle of water.

 

The ride back to Samar's house was quiet. Samar's head was resting on Red's shoulder, his arm was around her shoulders, lightly. The bottle of water that rested in her lap was almost empty, and Red had asked Dembe to contact Kate and get her to make something for when Samar got back. "What am I going to tell Finn?" She murmured brokenly. "He's going to know something's wrong."

"I think that, for tonight at least, he'll just be happy to see you." Red told her softly, pressing a barely there kiss to her temple.

Samar welcomed it for a few seconds. Then she pulled back just enough to look at him. "Will you stay with me tonight? I don't want to sleep alone."

"Of course." Red spoke without hesitation, and kissed her forehead. Samar felt a little better about the whole situation once she had that confirmation.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Recovery.

Samar let Red support her as they entered the house. Dembe held the door and stepped in after them. She just took a moment to bask in the familiarity of the house, the warmth. And the smell of food. Her stomach grumbled in response to the smell of it.

But more than that, she saw Finn sitting on the couch. He looked up as the door closed, and when he saw her, his eyes lit up. "Mom!" He cried, and all but scrambled off the couch. He ran to her and threw his arms around her, and she had to fight not to break down again as she hugged him.

"Hi, buddy." She murmured. Out of everyone she considered important in her life, it was Finn that she had missed most of all.

"Kate made soup." Finn took her hand and then pair of them walked to the table to sit down.

"You haven't eaten yet?" Samar asked as she sat down.

Finn shook his head. "I haven't had dinner yet. I wanted to wait for you." Samar blinked back tears hearing this. Red sat down on her other side.

A bowl of soup was placed in front of her, and it smelled so good that she didn't wait for anyone else to have theirs before she started eating. Not that she thought anyone expected her to wait. Samar was just so happy to be safe, to be eating. After that was done, Kate cleared the dishes.

"Raymond, I think Samar could use a shower, would you help her upstairs?" Kate asked.

Samar almost protested that she could make it on her own, but she wanted Red nearby. So she got up, after kissing the top of Finn's head, took Red's hand, and the pair of them walked up the stairs. Once they stepped into her room, he turned her to face him gently, barely touching her at all. "You're so brave." He whispered as he kissed her forehead. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying desperately not to cry. She would've been content to stay in his arms forever. But she felt him nudge her, and when she opened her eyes, she realized he was nudging her in the direction of the bathroom. Right. The shower she'd wanted to take. "I'll be right here when you're done." Samar kissed him gently on the lips, and then headed into the bathroom.

"Red, can you grab me a couple of towels, please?" She called out to him.

"Of course, my dear." Red spoke, and she heard him leave the room. Samar turned on the water and made sure it was warm. Then she stripped and got into the shower, closing the door behind her and pulling the curtain closed. She lost herself in the spray, scrubbing at her body in an attempt to forget everything that had happened to her the past day and a half. But no matter how hard she scrubbed, she couldn't get the ordeal out of her mind. Before she really processed what was happening, she was crying, and she moved back against the wall, sliding down to the floor and hugging herself. "Samar?" She heard Red's alarmed voice outside of the shower, despite the loudness of the running water. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." She got out, but she knew that she didn't sound convincing. Not with the way she was gasping and trying to get herself under control. She struggled to her feet and turned off the water.

"I'm going to leave a towel just outside for you, all right? You can grab it whenever you're ready." He told her, and sure enough, she saw him drape the towel over the door, within her reach. She waited until she heard his footsteps moving out of the bathroom before she reached for the towel and wrapped it around her body. Her skin was red and raw from the scrubbing.

What if Red wanted her less now? She had already been petrified that he wouldn't like what he saw, what if this made that worse?

Swallowing, she stepped out of the shower, wrapping her hair up in another towel. Samar listened for Red, but she heard no sounds outside. Cautiously, she ventured towards the door and opened it, stepping out of the bathroom. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him sitting on the bed with his head in his hands. His shoulders looked like they were shaking, slightly.

Her brows furrowed in concern. Was he crying?

"Red?" She murmured quietly, stepping forward cautiously.

He looked up, and she could very clearly see tear stains on his face, and tears welling in his eyes. He wiped his eyes hurriedly with his sleeve. "Samar, my dear, how are you feeling?"

She was far from okay, but she wasn't about to say that to him. Ever, if she could help it. "I'm okay." She lied as she moved over to sit down beside him, making sure the towel didn't slip or come undone.

Red gave her a sad smile. "Please, don't lie to me."

"Why are you crying?" Samar changed the subject.

"I'm so sorry I didn't find you sooner." If she hadn't been sitting right next to him, Samar was certain she wouldn't have heard him.

Samar rested her forehead against his shoulder. "Raymond." She murmured seriously. "Listen to me. What happened to me wasn't your fault." She felt Red's hand on her head, fingers combing through her damp hair.

"I almost lost you." Red spoke softly. "The thought of that...I refuse to even entertain it. But the fact that I came so close..."

"I know." She breathed, kissing his cheek.

"I'm sorry." Red's fingers didn't stop combing through her hair. "I should be the strong one in this situation."

Samar pulled back to look at him. "You're only human, Ray. No one knows that better than I do." She stroked her fingers gently over his cheek.

"I meant what I said earlier, you know." Red looked at her. "You're so incredibly brave." She didn't know what to say after that, so she said nothing. "Are you okay?" He repeated his question from earlier. "And please don't lie to me, Samar."

Samar felt tears sting her eyes, but she hurriedly blinked them away. "I'll be okay." She said finally, and despite how shaken she was, she really did believe that. "I was just so scared I'd never see you or Finn again. And what he did to me...I feel so dirty and used. Like I'll never be clean again."

"If I could bring him back to life, I would, just so I could torture him for making you feel that way." He breathed against her temple.

"You can touch me, you know." Samar told him, and she could tell by the way he moved slightly back from her that she'd caught him off guard. "You don't make me feel dirty. You make me feel safe." Her tone was hopeful. "I should probably get dressed first, though." She added as an afterthought.

Red nodded. "If that would make you more comfortable, absolutely. Would you like me to leave the room?" She nodded, and he got up, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I'll be right outside." With those words, he stepped out, closing the door behind him, leaving it open only a small crack.

Samar got up and let the towel drop, walking over to grab herself some pyjamas. She picked out a long pair of pants, and a short sleeved black t-shirt, and slipped into those. After giving it some thought, she put her hair into a ponytail. When that was done, she opened the door and let him back into the room.

Red stepped forward and wrapped her in his arms, holding her. "When you're ready, I thought we could go spend some time with Finn." He said gently.

"That sounds perfect." She murmured, sliding her arms around him and holding him close. "But for now, I'm fine here with you." She felt him smile against her forehead, and the two of them stayed safely wrapped in each other's embrace.

 

Samar wasn't expecting any visitors, so when she heard a knock at the door, she immediately tensed up.

"I'll get it." Red assured her, and then got up, while she stayed on the couch cuddling with Finn. "Hello, Lizzie." She heard Red say. Curious, Samar gently got up off the couch.

"I'll be right back." She murmured to Finn. Then she headed out to the front door, and found Red talking with Liz.

"Samar, I'm sorry." Liz said the second she saw her. "I shouldn't have made you go down into the basement."

Samar shook her head. "You can't have known, Liz." She reached out and touched Liz's shoulder gently.

"But I should have." Liz was insistent. "You practically did. You said it was a bad idea, and you were right, but I didn't listen."

If there was one thing Samar didn't like, it was her friends feeling bad for something that they couldn't control. "Liz, I understand why you feel guilty, but it isn't your fault. I don't blame you for a second." Surprising even herself, she opened her arms for a hug. Liz welcomed it, and soon the two of them were hugging.

"I'm really glad you're okay." Liz said as they pulled away from each other. "Anyway, I just came over to check on you. The rest of the team said they're glad you're okay, too. I should be going now."

Samar almost suggested that she stay, but at the same time, she just kind of wanted to be alone with Red and Finn. "Do you want to stay?" She asked. Liz was her friend, she knew that she had nothing to fear.

Liz smiled brightly. "I appreciate that, but I'm actually going out for drinks with Aram and Ressler. I just wanted to stop in and check on you. Have a nice night, both of you." Samar gave her another hug, which Liz returned, and then she Liz hugged Red before turning and opening the door. She left the house, and Samar watched her go.

Samar looked at Red. "Do you want to head back into the living room?" She asked.

"Whatever you want to do is fine by me, Samar." He kissed her cheek. Taking his hand, the two of them walked back into the living room, where Finn sat on the couch watching TV, and where Kate was in the kitchen.

"I'm almost done cleaning up, and then I'll head out." Kate spoke, and Samar was surprised. She didn't have to clean up.

"Kate, you don't have to do that." She said seriously.

"It's not a problem, Samar. Trust me." Kate gave her a genuine, but small, smile. Once she was finished, she walked over to them and gently touched Samar on the shoulder. "Welcome back."

Samar smiled genuinely. "Thank you. For everything." Then Kate headed towards the door and soon she was gone too, leaving Finn, herself and Red alone in the large house. She moved back over to sit next to Finn, who once again curled himself against her side. And Red sat on her other side, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. Finally feeling safe again, she curled up against Red, her free arm around Finn, and fell asleep.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter, the morning after she gets home.

"The jungles in India are so beautiful. So rich and green, I almost felt like I was dreaming..."

Samar heard Red's voice and slowly blinked awake, confused. She sat up, stretching, and found Red at the stove, cooking. Finn stood nearby, and the two of them seemed to be engrossed in a conversation.

"What was your favorite place to go?" Finn asked. "You must have been to a lot."

"I like a lot of the places I've been to for different reasons." Red told him. "I don't really have a favorite place." He glanced over and smiled at her. "Good morning, beautiful." Red told her, and as her cheeks grew hot, his smile only seemed to widen. "Or, I suppose the proper term would be afternoon."

"What time is it?" She asked, not getting up from the couch. She was too comfortable.

"Twelve thirty." Red walked over and knelt down to be at her level. "I hope you slept well. You needed it."

"I did." Samar responded, and leaned over to press her lips to his. She'd barely broken the kiss before Finn was climbing up next to her.

"Morning, mom." He said, cuddling into her side.

"Good morning, buddy." She pressed a kiss to his head. "Mm, something smells good."

"Scrambled eggs and pancakes." Red offered her his hand. She took it and let him pull her up, and the two of them, along with Finn, moved over to the table.

"Can I do anything to help?" Samar was never a fan of doing nothing.

"I think we've got it, my dear. You just rest." Red pressed a kiss to her forehead, and her eyes fluttered closed as he did so. Then himself and Finn headed back to the kitchen, where they worked to put the food onto plates, while she sat down. She watched them with a soft smile on her face, still unable to really comprehend how domestic this all was. Samar had honestly never, in all of her life, expected to have any of this. And yet she did.

She was snapped out of her reverie as Red and Finn came over carrying plates of food. It both looked and smelled fantastic. "Very well done, guys." She said, beaming as they put the plates down on the table, in the respective spots. They ate with snippets of conversation in between bites, and Samar felt relaxed and happy. Which was something she had direly missed the past few days.

 

Finn was with Roger downstairs, learning, while Samar was wrapped in Red's arms, and the pair of them were laying on her bed. She could feel his warm breath on her face, and it only served to further relax her. The television was on in the background, but she wasn't focused on anything but his embrace and his presence. His hand stroked over her hair.

"I adore you." He murmured.

"I know." Samar gave him a cheeky smile. Red's grin widened and he stroked his fingers over her cheek. There was no space between them save for the barrier of their clothing, and Samar knew she'd only want to get closer if she could. "But that doesn't mean I'll ever get tired of hearing it." She cupped his cheek, beaming as he leaned into her touch. "I'm curious, though. You didn't give Finn a straight answer. What  _was_  your favorite place to visit?"

"I thought the answer I gave him was solid." Red looked her in the eye. That was one thing she loved about him-whoa, loved about him?- how he always looked her in the eyes. "I like different places I've traveled to for different reasons. I loved the heat of the Bahamas, I loved the lush green jungles of India and Bali. I loved the architecture of Mount Merapi." If Samar closed her eyes, she knew she'd be able to picture everything he was telling her about in that moment. But doing so would mean sacrificing being able to see the way his eyes lit up as he talked about all of these different places. Samar felt relaxed, almost hypnotized by the carefree, innocent look on his face. "That's why I couldn't give him one answer. Because there are too many places that have made an imprint on my mind for me to pick just one."

"That makes sense." She murmured, nestling with her head against his chest. She'd been to a lot of places, sure, but she doubted she'd been to near as many as Red.

"You know, you'd love Bali." Red's fingers ran through her hair. "I'd very much like to take you there sometime. And Finn is more than welcome to come, too."

"I don't know." Samar murmured. "It sounds nice, and I'd love that, really. But I think I've taken more than enough time off work as it is. I can't really afford to take any more off."

"Your time off work hasn't been your fault, Samar." She felt Red press his lips to the top of her head. "But I understand. Will you let me take you there eventually, if not sometime soon?"

She pulled back just enough to look at him. "Eventually." Samar decided. "Not anytime soon, but eventually."

"How are you doing?" His fingers stroked lightly over her cheek. "Does anything hurt?"

Samar shook her head, leaning into his touch. "No, nothing hurts. I think this is one occasion when the mental and emotional injuries will be worse than the physical ones." Considering she had barely sustained any physical injuries at all during her captivity.

But if anyone who wasn't Red or Finn tried to touch her, especially a man, she didn't know how she'd react, and she was scared to find out. Even if Ressler and Cooper and Aram were like family to her. She knew she'd get past it eventually, it would just take time. "Samar, I promise you, you'll get through this." She felt Red's lips on her cheek. "I'll help you in every way I can."

"Thank you." She murmured. She turned to look at him, to say something more, but before she could, the door opened and Finn came into the room.

"Roger's done for the day." He said simply, and Samar sat up to help him onto the bed, where he nestled between the two of them. It didn't take long for her eyes to close and for her to fall asleep with Finn snuggled against her side and Red's hand in hers, both of them holding her son.

 

A Year Later

Samar opened her eyes to Finn climbing onto the bed with her. "Hey." She said with a gentle smile, sitting up to kiss his forehead. "Are you excited?" Finn nodded enthusiastically. About six months into the tutoring, Roger had told her that Finn was more than ready to start school. But because Finn liked Roger so much, Samar convinced him to finish out the year with Finn.

Today was Finn's first day of school.

"Okay, buddy, go get ready and I'll meet you down in the kitchen." Finn nodded and scrambled down off the bed, all but running out of the room. The door of her bathroom opened, and Samar turned on her side as Red came out with a towel around his waist, and one draped around his neck. He'd taken to spending the nights here with her, which she certainly wasn't complaining about. In fact, it had gotten to the point where she felt weird sleeping when he wasn't beside her. "I can't believe it's his first day of school already." She murmured as Red walked over to press a kiss to her forehead.

"He's a smart boy." Red sat down as she moved over to make room for him. "Kind of reminds me of myself at that age, honestly." He kissed her lips this time, and she welcomed the kiss.

"I should get up." She murmured.

"Yes, we should." Red agreed, and then gently pulled her into a sitting position. As she went to her closet to change, he headed back into the bathroom. Once Samar was dressed, she looked at herself in the mirror. The nightmares were fewer now, which she was grateful for-though she was almost certain they wouldn't be if she had to sleep alone.

But luckily she didn't.

"I'll meet you in the kitchen, okay?" She called into the bathroom, waiting for Red to confirm that he'd heard her before she headed downstairs. Finn was making himself a peanut butter sandwich, probably for lunch. Samar got out a paper bag and put a banana in there, followed by a yogurt and a plastic spoon. Once that was done, she set about making breakfast, which would consist of eggs and toast. "Do you want toast and eggs, Finn, or would you rather have cereal?"

"I'll have whatever you're having, Mom." Finn beamed at her, and she ruffled his hair.

 

By the time everything was ready, Red had come downstairs fully dressed after his shower, and Samar was setting the food on the table, while Finn's now packed lunch sat on the counter.

"Now, remember, don't let anyone push you around." Samar shook her head playfully at Red's conspiratorial tone. "But don't be violent, either. If someone's rude to you, just do what I do and get even."

"But try not to get detention on your first day." She added immediately, elbowing Red in the ribs. and The action got her a cheeky grin from him.

"I know, Mom." Finn said softly, and she smiled. The three of them made small talk as they ate, until the plates were empty. Samar got up to put the dishes away, but then they heard what she could only assume was the bus pull up outside. Samar left the dishes where they were for the time being and walked Finn out, Red with his arm around her.

"Have fun." She murmured as she kissed his forehead.

"I love you, mom." Finn kissed her cheek. "Bye, Red!" And he gave Red a hug that was quickly reciprocated. Then, with his lunch in hand, he ran out the door to the bus, while Samar and Red watched him from the porch. Samar felt tears close up her throat, and she swallowed hard. She let Red pull her gently into his side as Finn turned and waved before getting onto the bus.

"It seems like I adopted him only yesterday." She murmured, watching with misty eyes as the bus drove off.

"You've raised him well." Red told her, and she knew he meant it.

Samar looked at him. "I couldn't have done it without you, or Kate and Dembe, or Roger, and definitely not without the task force." She kissed him gently on the lips and he held her close. When she broke for air, she smiled at him. "Help me clean the dishes and we can spend the rest of the day relaxing on the couch."

"That sounds perfect." Red murmured, and the two of them headed back into the house, closing the door behind them.


End file.
